Real World
My Stinky Valentine

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Sep: D | Grade It Now!
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My Stinky Valentine

Walking home a Rachel voice-over says that "the way [Puck] looks, people assume that he's just a little punk. Then you talk to him some more and you realize that he's a genius." Oooh! Rachel liiiiikes Puuuck. Rachel and Puck sittin' in a tree. K-I-S-S. Oh gross. I can't finish that thought. Rachel claims that she and Puck have so much fun together as we get a montage of the two of them trying on crazy wigs and walking around town. In the middle of that we get armchair psychologist Dudd claiming that Rachel likes, "bad boys."

At the house the phone rings, and Puck goes into the kitchen to answer it but Pedro gets to it first. Puck is then distracted by Pedro's peanut butter on the counter and grabs a taste with his finger. Pedro catches him out of the corner of his eye and asks Puck if he just stuck his finger in the peanut butter and Puck denies it. Pedro is, quite justifiably, disgusted because he saw Puck picking his nose with the same finger earlier. Then, for no reason whatsoever, we get a dramatic reenactment of the bagel-cutting process complete with slo-mo and close-ups of the peanut butter. The hell? It's like it's pastry pornography or something. They're really reaching for something interesting this week.

Night-time. Judd, Rachel, Puck and, one of his V-Day dates (Delilah) all go to a bar called the Armadillo. Rachel is sitting at the bar laughing at Judd because he's such a nice guy. Judd asks Rachel if she likes bad boys. By his tone it's obvious that he's using Rachel's misguided attraction to Puck as an excuse to think that what women really want are jerks just so he can blame women for the fact that he can't get a date, instead of looking at himself objectively and realizing that he's a whiny boor. I hate guys like that. Okay, so, some time during a conversation that the producers have declined to show us Delilah allegedly made reference to a boyfriend. Rachel brings it up and Puck immediately gets on the bandwagon and gets all pissed off at Delilah. Whatever. Obviously if Puck has two dates for Valentine's Day it's not like he was expecting any sort of commitment from Delilah. Plus, if she has a boyfriend why is she going out with Puck anyway? Whatever! I don't care. It just proves that Puck is a huge egotist. During the cab ride home, hyPuckcrite tells Judd and Rachel that he broke off his date with Delilah because she had a boyfriend. Then, at home in the kitchen, Puck says that he is "too intense" for one girl. More like "too psychotic" if you ask me. Rachel, seeing her chance, offers to take Delilah's place but Puck stops her cold and tells her that he wouldn't date a roommate. Instead of counting her blessings, Rachel tries to backpedal saying that she doesn't want to date Puck, that she's just doing it so people will think that Puck has two dates. Um, whatever, Rachel, it's obvious to everyone that you dig the attention. You might as well just admit it.

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