Real World
No Friends Of Mine

Episode Report Card
Stee: D | Grade It Now!
Putting The "Pain" In "Campaign"

Or maybe that's just how my first PA job in Hollywood went, minus the editor. (Okay, fine. Including the editor.)

Previously. Mystic Tan lecture. John was looking forward to girls coming in to tan. Svet was in charge of finance. She cried in the closet about Tyler being mean to her. Tyler defended himself to Zach, telling Zach that he needs to "grow a pair." Or maybe he said "Cut your hair," and we all misheard it.

Credits. Water. Fishing. Kayak. Paula hides among the palm trees. Svet's dead face.

Water. Water. Moped. Gallery. The kids are painting and working. Zach camera-fros that they have to build the booths and paint and get weeks worth of work done in a very short length of time. Montage of building. They clearly have help, as we see random workers in the shots. Svet bitches, criticizing the paint colors. Tyler yells at her for not working, and then camera-queens that sometimes when Svet talks he wants to get a knife and start cutting himself. (Me too! But when you talk. And Janelle. And Zach. Everyone.) I wish Tyler would follow through on that impulse. Tyler continues to bitch at Svet. Svet camera-brats that Tyler thinks he's better than everyone else and predicts that, someday, he will get an enormous reality check. Yes, he will get his enormous reality check from BMP right after the show is finished. And he'll blow it all on tank tops and Michelle Kwan DVDs.

Ricky Croft, the housemates' boss, is there. The Graphic of Stupid tells us that he is the "Vice President" of Mystic Tan. Man, holmes needs a need lawyer if he invented the stupid fucking place and still couldn't even get made EVP or President or C-something-O. Maybe it's 'cause he refuses to shave and dresses like he isn't forty-seven with three kids. Ricky asks Svet if they need to go to the bank. They do. Svet camera-talks that she volunteered to be head of finance to better display to everyone that she has the necessary skills to be made manager. She doesn't.

Jose, Ricky, and Svet go to the bank. Ricky babbles about why they need a manager. Svet camera-talks some boring prattle about how her parents started some imaging center and she proved herself and is now the manager of that place (I so call bullshit on that. No way is she manager. She may stand behind the counter and Xerox insurance cards. But they probably make her use the Xerox machine without toner and constantly have to tell her she's doing a "super job!") More driving in their FORD! Svet says that she's "always been a manager," so it will be awkward if she isn't made manager of the tanning place. Were her words recorded in the wrong order, because that doesn't even make sense. "Always been a manager"? Always been an idiot.

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Real World




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