The roommates head to the train station. Simon lights up. My boy! Christina interviews that everyone felt too awkward to ask Simon about his sexuality. Maybe because it's irrelevant and none of their business? Simon interviews that he doesn't feel the need to announce that he's gay, because he doesn't expect the other roommates to announce that they are straight. Christina tells Simon that she knows the other guys don't mind that he's gay, and that she knows this because she talked to them about it. Well, it's so nice of them to give their permission for Simon to gay it up. Christina congratulates herself because her "gaydar is perfect." Yes, it really takes a finely tuned instrument to tell that Simon is gay. Simon interviews that he feels relieved to have it out in the open, but that he is a little anxious because he doesn't know what the others said about it. That would be a little disconcerting to have someone say, "We've all been discussing you, and we mostly think you're okay."
The roommates arrive in Paris. Eiffel Tower Shot Deux. Mallory sighs that the city is so beautiful. Eiffel Tower Shot Trois. Simon and Mallory hug and Mallory says she's going to stick with him. Simon kisses her head and tells her to stick with him and Leah. Mallory interviews that it's great that they are all together at the club. Simon interviews that they are all dressed up and ready to have fun. They go to a club called "Le Paris," which seems a bit unimaginative. Adam promises to make sure that Ace gets home. And by "home," he means, "into my bed." Christina interviews that she loves Paris at night, and that she could care less about the language and what other people think. At a club, the roommates sit around and drink. And dance. As you do. Suddenly, Christina is up on the bar, dancing. Chris points her out to the others. Chris interviews that they are "all ready to bug out." Leah joins Christina on the bar. Chris yells at them to take it off. Leah points at Ace and dances "seductively." Chris interviews that "Leah has been sweating Ace" and that she doesn't care if Ace knows it, because "she wants him bad." Leah tells Ace that she wants to bite his butt while he's sleeping. What? When did this turn into a David Lynch movie? It's like they took what she actually said, and then translated it into French and then back into English, because what? Ace says he's never had his ass bitten before. I'm so shocked by this conversation that I totally missed that the editors have gone back to the Dreaded Comic Sans Font of Captioning for this conversation. Leah says that she has to kiss him first. Ace says he won't kiss a smoker. Ace interviews that smoking is his biggest turnoff, and that the smell disgusts him. And he owns three bars? Cut to Leah, smoking. And telling Ace to fuck off. No, not the second part.