Real World

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Stee: C- | 1094 USERS: B-
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Have Cake, Will Eat It Too

Night. Russian-y music plays and the editors clearly have some time and extra establishing shots on their hands because they make a whole montage in time to the music as the phone rings and finally we go inside the house. Svet answers the phone and someone off-camera throws a shoe at her on the way. Oh, real mature, John!

As Svet talks on the phone to Martin, Janelle confides to a mock-sympathetic Tyler how Svet is nervous on Martin's behalf. Tyler says that it's "cute" that Martin is apparently "pudgy and stupid." Everybody laughs. John suggests that Tyler act extremely flamboyant when Martin arrives. Wait. What does he mean "act"? Tyler gets into the spirit and does a weird shimmy/jazz hands combo that is more spastic than gay. Tyler then camera-queens that it would indeed be funny if he tried to act as "gay" as possible -- that he exhibit every gay "ster-wo-type" possible to make Martin feel even more uncomfortable. Aw, good plan. The kids are all laughing. Svet comes out of the phone room and stops, suspicious, and acts if they're talking about her. They deny it. She leaves, casting a glance. They riff on, and Tyler suggests that he wear an evening gown. Oh god, please don't. Tyler claps and laughs. Commercials.

Ocean. Sun. Day. House. Paula checks her email and receives a reply from her mom. Turns out her mom was very touched and trusts Paula...adding that she hopes they can talk openly and reminding her that she's always there for her. Wow, not a terrible mom. Paula cries to us that it's a weight off her shoulders. Good, because I'm not so sure her brittle shoulders should be supporting any weight themselves.

Paula calls Keith, who I guess read a copy of her mom's reply and is happy about it. Keith translates and condenses the letter just a bit as basically her mom saying that she's "mad chill" about the situation. Yes, I'm sure that exactly what she was conveying. "Leaps and bounds," says Paula...hopefully getting herself prepared for the giant step back of being arrested a few months after the show stops taping.

Day. Sun through palm fronds. Clouds. A plane descends. It's Svet at the airport. She sees Martin. They kiss. Oh, those lovebirds. She tells us how happy it makes her feel to finally see him after so long. They leave the airport, and Svet's giant boobs immediately launch into telling Martin that her all roommates wanted to play a prank on him and get him to reveal and talk more than he's prepared to. Svet advises Martin to kill Tyler with kindness. Or, you know, with his scary Philly Russian mafia connections. Those might be more effective.

Real World

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