Real World
Tack And Jibe

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Kim: C+ | Grade It Now!
Tack And Jibe

It's closing time, and the roommates spill out onto the sidewalk. Cameran is wearing her stupid sideways trucker hat. Everyone is really drunk. Jamie tries to get everyone to go home, since they have to work in the morning. Cameran interviews that everyone studied before they went out, except her and Brad, because they thought they could study when they got home and study in the morning. Man, haven't they both gone to college? You never plan to study after a night out. It harshes your buzz to know that you have studying to do, and you never do the studying anyway. Duh. Plan ahead, people! Focus! Eye of the tiger!

The roommates pile into their SUV. Jacquese is driving. Cameran is doing the "drunk sorority girl" thing by proclaiming, "I'm wasted!" Robin interviews that somehow they started talking about the fact that both Jamie and Cameran have never kissed girls. One of the guys suggests that Jamie and Cameran kiss each other. Jacquese practically falls out of the driver's seat trying to twist around and see this. Frankie promises to kiss Robin if Cameran and Jamie kiss, too. Frankie and Robin take the challenge and start making out. Here's what I don't understand, and maybe it's because I'm repressed or old or whatever. I don't have a problem with girls kissing other girls, whether out of sexual desire or just to see what it feels like or curiosity or whatever. But wouldn't it be weird to kiss a roommate? Wouldn't it be awkward the next day? I guess I place too much importance on kissing. Or they don't place enough. Plus, it bothers me that the guys in the car are clearly popping boners over it. ["That's what would have bothered me, if I could have seen it in stupid Canada, which I can't -- that the girls aren't kissing each other because they're actually gay or even actually attracted to each other, but to give their male roommates a show. Why? Stupid." -- Wing Chun] Everyone tells Cameran and Jamie that it's their turn. Jamie tries to back out, and Cameran looks kind of disgusted. I would say that I would only do it if two of the guys kissed, because what's up with that? ["Exactly!" -- Wing Chun] Frankie vows, "I'm not going to pinky-swear with you guys ever again!" Oh, no! They're violating the sacred act of pinky-swearing! Shun them from the sisterhood! Cameran makes the sign of the cross a few times and then kisses Jamie with a little peck. Everyone's all, "Wooooooooo!"

But the wackiness never ends! Jacquese interviews that the girls decided to kiss again, and then Brad would have to show his penis. Robin offers Brad the deal, and I don't think Brad heard anything past, "I'll kiss her again," because he gets this totally dazed look in his eye. Well, more dazed than usual. Brad interviews that he's not sure how his penis got into the deal. Cameran offers to make out with Robin to see Brad's penis. Brad says that he needs to get aroused. Oh, so he's a grower, not a shower. Jacquese is desperately looking for a place to pull over so that he doesn't miss any of the action, which was actually pretty funny. Robin and Cameran start making out, and the guys go nuts. Brad keeps yelling out, "Cameran likes it!" and Jacquese leaps on top of Brad for a better view, and then starts humping the air, which is a little much. The girls break apart and start yelling at Brad to pull it out. Robin starts to undo Brad's pants. Brad interviews that he's starting to feel a little violated, which isn't easy to do. Brad promises to show Robin before she goes to sleep, but says they need to get home and negotiate first. Frankie interviews that they decided to go home and allow Brad to "get it to its full extent, no pun intended." Well, it's a good thing she didn't intend one, because there wasn't a pun in that sentence, unless I'm missing something.

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Real World




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