Wes stumbles inside. "Where is she?" he asks. In the bathroom, Danny takes photos as Wes asks Johanna if she talked to Wren tonight. Johanna has "I (heart) Rachel" written on her upper chest in eyeliner. (And: No, she doesn't.) Johanna, also drunk -- shocker -- babbles about Wren. Rachel comes in and says, gleefully, that Wren hates Wes. Rachel is eating a wiener. Rachel blows Wes off, telling him he's acting like he has PMS. Mel jumps in, adding that he's taking her Midol. Danny, with his dumb beehive knit cap, reaches out a hand and shakes his head for Mel to stop. Hee. Mel literally bounces away. Alone now, Danny tells Wes that it's "obviously Rachel." Instigator. Wes says he's going to kill her.
Wes then walks into the kitchen, where they're all grubbing, and tells Rachel to tell him the truth. Rachel camera-flabs that Wes can be an aggressive drunk. Wes is bitching that he got slapped, and Rachel reveals that Wren said she hated Wes, and that Rachel responded, "Cuz he told me you had sex with him." Rachel drunkenly goes on to say that she thinks it's poetic justice if Wes got slapped. I'm wondering why Rachel is being so bitchy, and then I understand: Rachel says that Wes slapped her, and then he got slapped by Wren. "Big fucking deal," Rachel adds. "Deal with it." Wes denies slapping Rachel, and she makes another snotty comment that he totally deserves. But then Wes camera-talks that Rachel did something wrong and needs to learn. Yeah, she needs to learn never to sign up to be on reality shows. That's her biggest mistake. Well, and also the whole Army thing. Rachel now yells that Wes is wasted and that he's being a "bitch." Then she yells, "Wren's a nice girl, so fuck off, bitch!" Now Wes starts yelling about having told her off-camera that he fucked Wren, but suddenly she brought it "on camera" -- and then he calls Rachel a bleeped name that causes the just-laughing Danny to jump out of his seat in shock and Johanna to pull Wes away. Now Danny is holding Rachel back and Johanna is holding Wes back and they're both yelling.