Real World
The One You've Been Waiting For

Episode Report Card
Jessica: D | 1 USERS: A+
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The One You've Been Waiting For

Aaron is still brushing his teeth.

And commercial, finally. Know how much time that entire incident took, from opening credits to commercial? Six minutes and thirty-seven seconds.

Know how much time the commercials took? Five minutes and thirty seconds. I read almost the first three chapters of Sweet Valley High 16: U.G.L.Y (You Ain't Got No Alibi) in that time!

Back in the hallway, Tami tells David she's "on guard." With her hairspray. Behind Tami, Beth nods furiously some more. David wearily tells the girls to go to sleep. And then Beth springs into action. She darts out from behind Tami and yells that she can't believe that David thought "what he did was nothing." Tami glares.

In an interview, David explains that the situation kept escalating because Beth kept instigating. "She kept pumping more hot air into the balloon," he says. Beth is full of hot air. I'd especially like to point out that in just the last recap, Beth basically did to Dom what David did to Tami. While Dom was intoxicated, no less.

David tells Beth and Tami that they were "laughing and giggling" while the entire thing was going down. They deny it, even though it's right there on tape. Tami yells that David's little joke wasn't funny, and that maybe he "can take off his pants, but [she's] not like that," and that David "totally disrespected [sic]" her. She storms off to her room. Beth, because she has to have the (lame) last word, tells David he doesn't have any respect for himself. She toddles after Tami. David follows them, saying, "Here you go, here you go" and drops his pants. Full Monty, y'all. Tami calls him a child. From within the girls' room, Irene threatens to call the police. I thought Irene was the police. A lightbulb goes on over Beth's head and she tells Tami that Tami ought to file charges against David. Jon informs David that Tami's filing charges. David comes out of his room at this, amazed. "She should!" Beth yells. "She was in her bra and underwear." Yes, embarrassing your roommate is a crime in Los Angeles. Oh, wait, no, it's not. David honestly looks shell-shocked and says that he was joking. "Oh my God," Beth yells at the top of her lungs. And because I can't say it enough: Dear Beth, I hate you. Love, Jessica. PS -- Shut up. Tami tells David his joke was not amusing. She begins to lunge at him with the Hairspray of Death, but thinks better of it and wanders back to her own room.

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Real World

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