Aaron takes Glen and Dom to look at Royce Hall, which is probably the most famous of all of UCLA's buildings, and then to watch a girl band perform on the quad at lunch. He says that he's giving "a show and tell" to his roommates, because he doesn't think they quite get what he does on campus all day. What he seems to be doing, mostly, is socializing, since he knows almost everyone who walks past them. Dom voice-overs that UCLA seems like a "big social club, with classes between the socializing." Which is partially true. The other part is when you're a dip like I was, who really enjoyed the school part of school, and whose plan was to go to grad school and get a PhD and become a professor and so you spend hours and hours in the library and study your ass off and then you still don't get into the graduate schools you wanted to go to, and then you become a copywriter and then you get laid off and lie around and collect unemployment. I should have spent more time drinking, people! But don't get me wrong, I spent plenty of time drinking. Wow, where was I? Right, Aaron is BMOC.

Back in Kentucky, Jon shows his family pictures of his roommates, and the house, and the bits of Los Angeles he's seen, which is basically the view from the sofa. They ooh and ah. Jon voice-overs that he misses his roommates, and that he never expected to feel that way. I. Am. So. Bored. Nobody cares! Get back to crazy Tami and her wired-shut jaw!

Apparently, Owensboro is the barbecue capital of the world, and indeed, Jon attends one huge-ass barbecue while he's at home. Hmmm, barbecue. Over shots of ribs and chili, he voice-overs that he's a big fish in a small pond in Owensboro and a small fish in a big pond in Los Angeles. Hmmm, fish.

Goldie comes to Jon's house to pick him up for a show of some unspecified sort. As Jon lumbers into Goldie's van, he explains that she gave him his big start, and that he loves her for it. She's wearing, appropriately, a flashy gold jumpsuit. I wonder if her entire wardrobe is gold.

The show? At a middle school. It's very O-Town. Without the choreography. The middle school kids go crazy wild for Jon. It's like that famous footage of girls crying and ripping out their hair, watching the Beatles perform on Ed Sullivan. Except that was the Beatles. And this is Jon. He gives some crazy pseudo-inspirational speech about dreams and ambition and whatnot, and then starts to sing and everyone -- I'm telling you, five hundred people, including grown men -- leap to their feet and start screaming and yelling and singing along. I'm making the same face that Director Dan made earlier. The "help me" face.