Melissa and Jamie, who are talking and dancing at the bar. In an interview, Jamie says he is attracted to Melissa because when he is around her, he is around a "completely original and completely special person." Plus, she gives him a huge ego boost. Jamie tells Melissa that they should engage in a "Hollywood kiss," and they start pretending to make out for the camera. Clearly, these two are drinking something a little stronger than cranberry juice. Melissa blows kisses to Jamie, but the sight of Danny dancing in the background distracts me. He's a good dancer! Anyway, in an interview, Melissa says she doesn't want to like Jamie, but she can feel it coming on and "the fight is on." Didn't we cover this ground last week? Can't they just do it already and get it over with? Melissa quotes the song that is playing in the background and tells Jamie, "I would love to love to love you." Jamie says it back to her. Melissa says they can't because he's a nerd, and she's a nerd, and two nerds together would be...words fail her as she just shakes her head. Tides reverse their flow all over the earth, because Jamie shakes his lunar-sized head too.
It's the next day and Melissa is on the phone with Ryan, who tells her that he is serious "like a heart attack" about coming to visit her this weekend. In an interview, Melissa says she dated Ryan for a month and a half. Back on the phone, Melissa informs Ryan he will be there for her birthday. Hey, if they only dated for six weeks, I don't expect him to know when her birthday is. I can barely remember when my own birthday is half the time. Melissa is having a birthday party at "the Red Room." She asks Ryan what his visit is going to be like. Or maybe now she's talking to her Psychic Friend. It's not really clear. In an interview, Melissa says she's scared of Ryan's visit because she likes seeing other boys. She thinks Ryan is going to come out and "stake his claim" to her, and then she can't "enjoy the company of men." Is that what the kids are calling it these days? This whole interview would be a lot more interesting if we had any freaking clue what Ryan said back to her. Did he say that he was coming out to stake his claim? Or is Melissa reading into it too much? We will never know. Melissa tells Ryan she's scared that they will argue during his visit, and she doesn't want to do that. We see a shot of Melissa frantically rubbing the arm of the couch, and it's scary. Finally, she tells him that she hopes his visit is "completely nice." Wow, I bet he's already packed and ready to go, with that kind of enthusiasm.