Real World
Wes, You Ignorant Slut

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Wes, You Ignorant Slut

In the girls' room, Lacey asks Jo and Nehemiah whether they think Wes used a condom. Nehemiah hopes he did; Lacey hopes that he did, because Megan is "gross." Which she's not. She's easy, but she didn't look gross. Lacey is confused by why Wes would get with such a gross girl. Nehemiah looks at her and says, "Wes is not attractive." And that is The Most Awesome Thing I Saw on TV Last Week. They all laugh. Nehemiah tells Lacey that Megan was cute, "for Wes."

Aaaaugh! Sorry, it's Wes's pixellated ass, walking through the loft. He is carrying the used condom to the bathroom. Naked. As he leaves one of the stalls (presumably having flushed the nasty rubber), Melinda, Rachel, and Jo are all in the bathroom. They laugh, and Rachel does the cooties dance. Jo hands Wes a pink rose, "for the first time getting laid." He has grabbed a towel to cover up his shame, and he tucks the rose into it. Johanna gives an interview in which she seems genuinely pleased that Wes was able to achieve his goal of finally getting laid. Wes tries to joke around with the girls, but they keep laughing at him and doing the cooties dance.

Back in Wes's room, Megan is having trouble finding her shirt. Since she didn't start taking off her clothes until they got into the room, I'm not sure where the hell it could have gotten to. The girls overhear this, and they can't stop laughing. Wes (wearing boxer shorts) and Megan (wearing Wes's t-shirt), emerge from the bedroom. Wes asks the girls, "If you were a black shirt, where would you be?" Rachel: "It would be on me." Heh.

Melinda interviews about the irony of Wes taking so long to get laid, in light of his constant bragging about all the hot girls who allegedly throw themselves at him. Cut to Wes, still wearing only his boxer shorts, saying goodbye to Megan on the porch in front of the loft. As they're kissing, the door to the loft closes, locking Wes out. He starts to bang on the door (apparently having left his keys in his other pair of boxer shorts), while Rachel and Jo watch him on the security monitor. Jo opens the door while Rachel grabs a pic with her camera. And I'm ashamed to say that in the picture, Wes has a pretty decent body. I know, I've lost your respect (assuming I ever had it), but it had to be said.

Megan walks away from the loft, already making a call on her cell phone. She clearly got what she wanted.

Wes (still only wearing boxers) enters the loft, where the girls are all waiting for him on the round couch. One of them asks him if he wore a condom (which I think they all saw him carrying through the loft). He interviews that he worries about the "consequences of bringing random girls back, but I'm always very, very careful as to use any sort of protection necessary." Wes, I'd say your best protection is your fugly face, as it protects you from having sex with that many girls in the first place. Someone asks Wes why Megan left so quickly, and he tells them that she left because as soon as they were finished, he asked her, "Do you want me to call you a taxi?" I think someone should tell Wes that if he's nice to a woman, she might have sex with him more than once. The girls are scandalized, but not so scandalized that they don't start doing their impressions of Wes and Megan's nasty bunny sex. Commercials.

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Real World

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