(Crew: "Man are you guys bored yet?"
Tess: "No, huh uh.")
Cole: "Let's eat worms! And use up an entire week's worth of camera batteries while giggling!"
Redshirts: "Can we just eat food, though?"
Cole: "No! I am too weird!"
Boy Redshirt: "I am tired from how weird you are."
Girl Redshirt: "...And now we are alone. Wanna blow-job?"
(Tess: "Man, between the ultimatums and cheating on each other we are even shittier people than I thought.")
Cole: "No, I have become too magic for blow-jobs."
That is: Quite a price to pay.
Cole: "Man, I am so excited! Goodnight!"
(Bleep. Zonk. Lapsed time. Scary faces pressing into the tent. Absolutely the worst thing that can happen if you're in a tent is a face pushing from the other side, From The Other Side.)
Cole: "It's hours later, and we're all about to die! Do you hear that whistling sound?"
Salsa: "It's probably El Monkeychupa. Sucker of monkeys."
Indeed. The monkey has been flayed and hung from a tree. Just like that part in One Hundred Years Of Solitude where the reality TV crew gets too close to mutant monster made out of wind and the monkey can't whistle to make it go away, because of physiology.
Cole: "I guess that monkey just didn't pass the test of the Boiuna. It's no big deal."
Redshirts: "Oh my God, though. Also, El Monkeychupa took away our food you wouldn't let us eat."
Cole: "Whatever, we're having a blast! Nature! Magic!"
(Jahel: "This isn't like the fun Smoke Monsters and Mom Drowners and Babyface Blindergrunts we've been fighting off every couple days without ever seeming to remember them. This Monkeychupa is serious business. I have this feeling today's the day we're going to see Dr. Emmet Cole get his face eaten off.")
Cappy: "Man, watching that old dude trip balls is really boring, huh?"
Lena: "I'm more upset about my dead father."
Cappy: "Isn't it weird how in like every movie about a gross nice guy, the girl's dad dies and he somehow gets laid? How is that not offensive?"
Lena: "I want to tell you some more about my accordion."
Cappy: "...And there went my boner."
Lena: "You want to hear something really fucked up? I was the one that set off the beacon. To give them all hope so they would come look for my dad."
Cappy: "Yeah, and me. You also found and saved me."
Lena: "Sure, but I mean..."