Everybody wanted to find Dr. Emmet Cole and nobody cared about Russ Landry, despite him being played -- as it turns out -- by Lee Tergesen. As the crew made their way deeper into the uncharted Boiuna, they kept having ghost experiences and not learning from them. It was okay though, because they were all kind of dicks and it's nice to watch them suffer.
Clark, I Think?: "Lena, what is that makes you so horrible? Like what's with the accordion, for example?"
Lena: "Sometimes when you feel an intense need for male approval, you can really do some terrible shit in the pursuit of seeming interesting. Hardly ever works out."
Clark: "Anything else on your mind?"
Lena: "Just, like, it's kind of bullshit that everybody's so worried about Cole, but my dad is also missing. Like, we are also looking for my dad. But that's so unimportant to the show and everyody on it that this is the first episode of the series where they even say what his name is."
Cameraman: "What that says is that we're going to find him in this episode, because he isn't significant to the overall plot. You should be happy, the show's only half over and you're getting some kind of story arc. Can't say that for anybody else."
Lena: "That is a good point. Let's see some footage of my dad, so we know who'll be guest starring as him later in the episode. Because of how TV works and how shows are shot. I guarantee we won't be seeing him again on this show unless they taped pickup shots this week for later."
It is: LEE TERGESEN! What great news! This show just got a lot cooler, and about three times hotter.
We know where to look next -- I guess because of Cappy somehow? Anyway, Tess has a bug up her ass, surprisingly enough, and is barking out orders with ten times her usual lack of appeal or charisma.
Tess: "Today could be the day we find my husband, Dr. Emmet Cole! But visibility is low! So I need everybody to do whatever I am screaming about! NOW!"
They: Do. It involves keeping lookout for the big nothing in the fog, for about half the episode I would estimate.
Adorable: Lincoln, hopping around the deck with his flashlight.
Adorable: Jahel, for once.
There's a ROCK! Lincoln tells Tess and she easily steers around it. It is riveting.
There's a BOAT! Lincoln tells Tess, and she steers... directly into it.