The River
The Experiment

Episode Report Card
Jacob Clifton: A+ | Grade It Now!
How I Hate Your Mother


Zombies attack. We run from them. This goes on forever and ever.


Tess: "Was Emmet here? What happened to him?"
Rabbit: "They fixed him up, gave him some tennis shoes and shaved him, and then right around that point in time everybody turned into zombies."
Tess: "Did he turn into a zombie? Or maybe a dragonfly cocoon?"
Rabbit: "I'm not sure, but I doubt it. Especially that second one, I don't think that's a thing that would happen."

Rabbit: "Sorry we left you in eternal torment that time, Jonas."
Jonas: "It's okay. I suddenly hate Dr. Emmet Cole so much that it is freaky."

Linc: "I found damaged video records on this laptop. Using computer skills, I shall recover this footage I have found. This found footage, if you will."
Lena, verbatim: "Here, let me try. You're really good with the blood and the guts, but the electronics? Not so much."
Lincoln: "You are such a fucking asshole. Why do you talk like that, like someone on an internet forum in 1999 that doesn't know they're a nerd? Why are you like this? Who could ever love you?"
Lena: "Epic fail!"

Lincoln: "You know what would be really inappropriate? If I started flirting with you right now."

So he does. And they do. And Cappie is like a foot away, smoldering with all this random rage out of nowhere, and it's so stupid. But not as stupid as...

Lena: "I just know your Dad's alive."
Lincoln, verbatim: "My mom's been saying he's alive for months. But somehow when you say it, it feels true."

Yeah, as we'll learn, that's because she's suddenly got psychic powers that make her bite her tongue off in the middle of REI. But also, what a stupid thing to say to a person, that you would never actually say.


...I'll let Lincoln break it down for you:

Lincoln: "Looks like they were looking for a cure to cancer. They were looking for a specific gene sequence in the [Secret Angel People]. They managed to isolate part of the variant gene and recombine it into a retrovirus. When it was ready, it was meant to act as a cure."

They cut open a Boiunatic and talk about his sexy youthful cardiovascular system, and that's when -- as Linc says -- things go bad.

Lincoln: "Based on no information whatsoever, I have decided this was their head of security."
Kurt: "(That is a good guess.)"

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The River




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