The Script & The Sherpa

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Meat Is Murder

Eric: "Not trying to be an asshole, or anything? But do we know each other?" The naked dude gets all aggressive and breathy and he's all, "You kidding me?" And this is Josh Weinstein, with Triad (apparently an agenting concern), and they met at "the fight." Very butch for a man with his wanger hanging out for no reason, Josh. He also says it in this way that isn't so much hurt as it is threatening. "All right, Josh, do me a favor. Put a towel on or something. Cover up." Valid. Josh's response? Not so much. "Not a locker room guy? No problem." Problem? Well, concern. Well, it's more of a follow-up question, really. What exactly is a "locker room" guy? I might need to know this at some point so I can avoid these "locker room guys." "So listen, Eric," he continues, this Josh Weinstein with the eye contact and the slowly-clothed nudity, "I didn't want to interrupt Vince's workout, but I got a great piece of material..." Oh, uh huh? Actually, I think I'm getting it. I think I've been approached by "locker room" guys before. It's why I carry pepper spray with me everywhere, even into the shower. No means no. "Could you do me a favor?" he continues. Oh yeah? Okay, is this what happens when you spend too long in the HoYay thread? I just checked in to see what HoYay people thought about Angel and Spike, I swear! I didn't even read that many posts (beyond the mandatory fifteen pages or fifteen days whatever is shorter, of course), but is it possible I somehow started thinking like a hammer and now everything looks like a nail? Am I seeing a vase where really there's just two faces? Or is this sexual intimidation? Because if so? He's brilliant. I can see Ari doing something like this. Come to think of it, he has. I picture Naked Josh all, "Let's hug it out, bitch," and giggle nervously. Locker rooms creep me out because of IT. And high school. Anyway, he's all about his great piece of material and can Vince maybe "take a look?" Is this becoming a hostile lockering environment? It is for me anyway. I just found a pubic hair on my Powerade.

Josh nakedly and slowly clothing himself-ly says that the script is all kinds of words and so great and gritty as shit and then Naked Josh does Eric the "favor" of a tiny little handjob when he applauds Eric's take on turning down Matterhorn in the first episode. The more clothes Josh puts on, the more attractive he becomes. Even, like, his watch makes him better-looking. I'm going to be on and on about this in therapy one day. I've got what they call a phobia, I think. "I bet Ari pushed hard for that one." Yeah, maybe it's just me. "You know he doesn't read, right?" There's this weird intonation at the end when he says the script "takes place in your old neighborhood. Queens, right?" And the "right?" slides so far up the staff that...oh damn. Now I'm doing it. Gay really is a virus and I caught it after 26 years of denial and compromise and unhappiness. Anyway, his voice squeaks so high up that only a Pekingese dog could hear it. Eric is charmed by this, and the darling grin that goes along with it. Josh feels Eric smile even though he's turned around -- such is the power of the lips -- and he does a minimalist hell yeah arm movement like when you're in the Army and they're telling you "Go! Kill!" like you're pulling an imaginary honking cord in an eighteen-wheeler. I think I like this kid. He's probably going to end up some weird mix of Billy Chenowith and Ari Gold, but whatever.

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