The Script & The Sherpa

Episode Report Card
admin: C+ | Grade It Now!
Meat Is Murder

Fiona and Vince show up and Fiona is just dripping about the script, it made her cry, and Eric is now officially having like the worst day ever. Then! So is Shauna, who Vince tells he is suddenly not doing the motorcycle shoot because Fiona doesn't like the image it represents and Shauna is like, you know you're majorly fucking with my life here, with all these people and photographers and free motorcycles and I'm your fucking publicist and she's right. It's environmental in nature, the problem of Fiona with the motorcycle, and Shauna points out that Fiona doesn't seem to mind riding around in Vince's Hummer but -- since Shauna knows Turtle was lying, as noted on the forums -- doesn't also mention the Uggs, which were ostensibly for Fiona also. It's a battle of the Hey It's That Girl Who Appeared Out Of Nowhere And Became Central To The Show. Drama, sitting on the bike (admittedly, as if he were born there, which with their mom he might have been), offers his own image in recompense, and Shauna's like, "What am I supposed to do with your fucking picture?" and then tells Turtle to give her back the Uggs. Turtle says she'll have to pry them from his cold dead hands, and I cross my fingers, and she practically hands Vince her purse so she can actually kill Turtle, but that damned dog from the first episode appears from nowhere and now it's a three-way grudge match of Appeared Out Of Nowhere and Arnold the dog wins, but we don't, because Turtle didn't die. She almost starts crying. Aww. She should kill them all in their sleep. She wouldn't be wrong.

Turtle and Drama jostle each other a little bit over by the pool table and there's a dumb joke about how Turtle didn't "call a bank shot" and how he "needs to project more" and Turtle refers to Drama's voice coach whatever whatever and Vince appears, having read the script. Eric's all, "How many pages?" And Vince says he read all of it. "How did it end?" And Vince has no affect as he asks, "What are you, an asshole?" And I'm like, sadly? Today, he is, for some reason. Eric gets all explainy and points out what everybody already noticed, that Vince ignored the script until Fiona liked it. He doesn't point out the other obvious thing, which is that this is all very stupid. "Call Ari and find out why he doesn't know about it," says Vince, and I'm so sure he didn't, Vince. I bet there's a good reason. I bet there are Greeks inside of that script. Turtle and Drama pants around and it's not even that funny at all so we won't talk about it.

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