Simple Life
The Simple Life Reunion

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The Simple Life Reunion

And now it's time to bring out Paris and Nicole! I don't know why I just used an exclamation point. Leeza is rubbing off on me. Paris and Nicole drive a pink pick-up, which may or may not be the same one they drove around Altus. Paris and Tinkerbell and Nicole head to the stage. After greeting Leeza, they have big hugs for the whole Leding family, and finally sit down. Leeza asks the audience to give Paris and Nicole an Arkansas welcome, and they do that hog-calling cheer without very much enthusiasm. Shut up, Leeza. God, she is annoying. Leeza thinks that shows that the townspeople really embraced the girls. Or that they are good at following directions in order to get on camera. Kind of like Paris and Nicole! Leeza asks how it is to see the Ledings again. Nicole says it's crazy, because she hasn't seen them in so long, and it's like not seeing your family for six months. Leeza shows her big brains by pointing out that Braxton must be much bigger now, and then tells Braxton that he stole the show.

Leeza says that they all have a lot of questions, but that they should start with something basic. Leeza claims that producers came to Paris with a lot of ideas to do shows about being glamorous and a socialite, but that Paris decided to go to a farm. Yeah, I'm so sure it was totally Paris's idea. Paris thought it would be something different, and something she'd never experience otherwise. Leeza says that it worked, because America loves the show. They do? Or do they love to hate it? Leeza asks what their parents thought of the show. Nicole says that her parents loved it and thought it was funny. Nicole says that her parents didn't believe some of the stuff she did until they saw it on the show. Leeza says that Paris's parents must be proud, and Paris agrees that they are. I have no words for that one. "Wow, our daughter actually went to a farm and whined and complained and pouted and preened the whole time, and was unable to hold down a job for more than a day!" Leeza is impressed that Paris and Nicole have been friends for so long, like, why is that an accomplishment? They show a photo of the girls dressed up as maids. They are cute. Paris says that they used to dress up all the time, and that they wanted to grow up and be housekeepers. Ha ha! Manual labor! Minimum wage! That's hilarious.

Leeza asks whether Nicole or Paris is the instigator when they get into mischief. Nicole says that they feed off each other, because they look at each other and know what each other is thinking. Either Leeza heard a different answer than I did, or she just ignored what they said, because she continues by asking if Paris sets things up and Nicole just goes for it. Paris says that Nicole will go for anything. Leeza uses that to introduce the clip of Nicole fake crying when the feed store guy came to collect his money. Leeza says that the clip was over the top, and then claims, "Girls, we've all been there, right? Turn on the tears. Start crying." No, Leeza, only manipulative wenches like you use tears to manipulate men. Man, she is hateful. Leeza asks if Nicole really thought the guy would believe it. Nicole says it was so unexpected, and that she didn't know what to do, so she tried anything. Leeza says that there were times watching it when she didn't know whether to hug the girls or slap them. Janet agrees, and says that they laughed when they watched it, at times. Leeza says that it comes naturally to the girls, and that they could turn it on. So, they're naturally manipulative liars? Is that a compliment, really?

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Simple Life

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