Simple Life
We'll Have A Gala Old Time

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Kim: C- | Grade It Now!
We'll Have A Gala Old Time

Not Waylon says that it's been "nearly two weeks" since Paris and Nicole arrived. I'm so confused by this timeline. Wasn't it just Day Seven? And nothing happened in between? Why tell us which day it is if they're just going to jump around? Anyway, Paris and Nicole stand by the side of the road and put out their thumbs, trying to hitch a ride. Why would they do that? Are they bored? Did their truck break down? These are unsolved mysteries.

Not Waylon tells us that everyone in Altus has an opinion about Paris and Nicole. Some guy stops and tells the girls that hitchhiking is illegal in Arkansas, and then interviews that the girls are pretty, and that he enjoys them. Some woman interviews that the girls don't have to dress like streetwalkers. The editors cut in some guy saying, "That's what they were back in California," implying that people think the girls were hookers. But I thought everyone knew they are heiresses? Some Harry Knowles-alike says that Paris and Nicole are "purty." A female hairdresser says that the girls should show more respect for the town. Paris and Nicole interview that the people in the town don't get them, but that they're not going to give up. It bothered me that, based on this segment, women who have a problem with Paris and Nicole are just jealous. It couldn't possibly be because they're little punks with bad attitudes and no respect for anything. Have I mentioned lately that I'm sixty-five? I expect my AARP card any day now.

It's Day Thirteen. Paris powders her face in the supermarket while waiting for her groceries to be checked out. Some woman comes up and asks if she's "the Richie woman." Paris thinks the woman is asking if she's rich, and says that she guesses she is. The woman chuckles and asks if Paris is spoiled. Man, and I thought Paris and Nicole were rude. Who just walks up to a stranger and asks if she is rich and spoiled? Paris says she wouldn't be there if she were spoiled. The woman chuckles some more and welcomes Paris to town.

Paris, Nicole, and Curly drive down the road in the blue truck. It looks like they just went to McDonald's, based on the cup in Curly's hand. What, no love for Sonic? Paris says that she hates driving on rocky roads in the truck, as the three of them rattle around the cab. Paris amends her statement to say that she hates driving on any road in that truck.

At the Leding farm, the phone rings and Cayne answers. It's Mayor Post. Paris takes the phone and voice-overs that the mayor told her that she needed to register Tinkerbell. The mayor explains that she needs to make sure the dog is vaccinated, and asks Paris to bring her in. Yeah, I'm so sure the mayor of the town spends time calling people and telling them to license their dogs. Meanwhile, Tinkerbell is totally peeing on a pink rug inside the house. Nice. The Mayor tells Paris to come to City Hall, and the editors make it look like Paris hangs up the phone disgustedly before the Mayor is even done talking.

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Simple Life




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