Sopranos
Sopranos

Episode Report Card
Aaron: C- | 578 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Angry Fat Man

Mere moments after his "motherfucker," Tony has already arrived at Janice's place. Now I may not know my Filones from my Kolars, but I do know that Livia's house is right around the corner from Bobby's. So if you were wondering, that explains why we see him walking away instead of driving at the end of the episode. Back in this scene, however, Bobby can barely even get the front door all the way open before Tony storms into the kitchen and starts chasing Janice around the table. She predictably declares her intention to sue Blondie, the newscasters, the township, FIFA, the AFL-CIO, McDonalds, the cop who tackled her, three random guys named Bill, and the Ford Motor Company for every penny she can get. "No. You're. Not," growls Tony, before ordering her to shut up, pay the fine, and not "turn this into one of [her] fucking cause celebras." Wow. Check out Tony getting all funky with the French this week! Although isn't it actually Toyota that makes a coupe or something called "Celebra"? Or is it an allergy medication? I can never remember. "Anybody's side but mine," complains Janice. "That bitch is lucky I didn't kill her." "Well, we know that," replies Tony, with an evil grin. Understanding slowly dawns on Bobby's face like the fourteen eggs sunny-side up he had for breakfast, and I think Sopranos historians will forever look back on this as the precise moment when he finally realized what a mistake this marriage was. "You and your fucking temper," warns Tony. He heads for the door, but then pivots and gets right back in Bobby's face. "This is the end of it," he says. Janice knows he's right, which only pisses her off even more (remember that later, by the way). "Get out!" she screams, completely failing to add the requisite "Now." Which is actually for the best, because then I would have been obligated to like the episode, and I'd really much rather just sit here and stew in my righteous anger for a while.

Bobby follows Tony out of the house, begging him see the silver lining here, which is that Janice reacted the way she did because she was finally feeling maternal enough to stick up for Sophia. "I don't give a fuck," replies Tony, before softening. "All right, I do give a fuck, but how many times have I got to tell you? Get control of your wife." Yeah. So says the fat guy with the angry wife who hates him. No, not that one. The other one

Sopranos

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