Cut to Tony, looking at a Polaroid of the Mercedes. He's in the waiting room at Junior's doctor's office. As he goes in for the meet, the nurse asks him to help get Junior's clothes off. Somehow, I don't think that's gonna happen. Tony asks how he's doing, and Junior responds that "it hurts like the pit and the pendulum just to wipe [himself]." I don't even know what that means, but it sounds painful, and it's way more than I needed to know about Junior's tell-tale colon. Anyway, Tony is there to ask about their contact in Italy, whom Junior has met. Uncle J bitches about losing the carjacking ring to Tony, then waxes nostalgic about the high times of yore. Don Vito apparently came over to America in the sixties, and they had a big party on a boat. Junior describes Don Vito as a serious man, although "he doesn't listen to opera, which is a fucking break." He also mentions that Don Vito is a distant, distant cousin, and then laments that he never had the chance to go Italy himself. Tony tells him, "It's not over yet," and leaves.
Now Meadow is the one bitching about not getting to go to Italy as she sets the table in the Soprano home. Tony tells her it's a business trip, and Meadow gives him grief for not even taking Mom. Tony tries to explain, saying "it's not worth the jet lag," but it seems that neither of the Soprano women are buying it. Meadow goes on and on about how great Italy is until Carmela, who's been seething the whole time, drops a dish on the floor and breaks it. Tony tries to apologize, for this and for canceling a trip to Bermuda last fall. He refers to football season as "our busiest month of the year," which I find funny for some reason. Finally he just gives up, and they all sulk.
So this is what a party store looks like. I'd heard of them, but never actually seen one. Anyway, Pussy and Skip (a.k.a. the FBI guy) are wandering the aisles, discussing Tony's carjacking operation. The cars are being exported to Europe. Except when Skip asks who's in charge, Pussy lies and says Ray Curto. Skip seems to buy it. Suddenly an Elvis impersonator with a handful of pink balloons yells, "Hey! Pussy!" across the store. That's weird on so many levels, I don't even know where to begin. Plus, I thought Vegas was the Elvis capital and Atlantic City was all about Sinatra. Whatever. Turns out Elvis is a buddy of Pussy's (which isn't really a surprise if you know what I mean, and I think you do), and Pussy isn't pleased to be seen in the company of an undercover FBI agent. There's awkward small talk, and Elvis refers to Pussy as "the Colonel," which will be important later. Pussy introduces Skip as a "friend of ours, from Dover, Delaware." Elvis gets inappropriately excited by this, and reveals that he's from Dover, New Jersey. He asks if Skip knows where they got the name. "Uh, the cliffs?" Skip stammers. Elvis gets inappropriately disappointed at not being the King of Dover Trivia. I'm not sure if it's the character or the actor, but one of them needs Prozac, and badly. More awkward chat, and Pussy is totally rude to Elvis, who finally snaps. "Let me think. Did I ever meet any connected guys from Delaware? No. No, I don't think so...so, you, Mr. Rude Cocksucker, see ya around." He leaves, and I can't help but note that he'd make a better Pesci impersonator than Elvis. He's still not as good as Christopher, though.