Episode Report Card
Aaron: B- | Grade It Now!
Just like The Godfather, but without the monkey

Bonpensiero boudoir. Angie awakens to hear Pussy yelling. She nudges him and tells him he was having a nightmare.

Back in Italy, Paulie drags Christopher out of bed and tells him they have to hang with Nino. He's worried that if Christopher doesn't get it together, he won't get made. Chris reiterates his desire to visit the volcano. Across town, Tony arrives at Annalisa's. He tips the guy who leads him to his bedroom, and the guy looks at him like he's nuts. Tony goes onto the balcony and looks out at the beautiful Italian scenery. Then he glances down below, and spots even more beautiful Italian scenery -- Annalisa in a bikini. He gazes longingly.

In Jersey, Janice has come over to see Carmela. Janice feels Carmela isn't missing much by not going to Italy, because of all the sexual harassment she (Janice) experienced on her last trip. Carmela, because she's like that, wants to get straight to the gossip, and tells all about Angie's divorce plans. Janice thinks it's a great idea, which horrifies Carmela. Janice delivers a ringing indictment of the Mafia-male culture, using phrases like "swaggering mama's boy" and "Madonna-whore complex." She asks Carmela how "A woman of [her] intelligence can be so content to ask so little from [her] life." Carmela justifies her marriage to Tony by invoking religion, and throws the fact that Janice is dating a mobster herself right back in her face. Janice justifies her relationship with Richie by invoking anal rape. No, really. Richie is apparently "sensitive to the plight of women," after all his time in jail. Carmela laughs almost as hard as I do at that line.

Still on the balcony, Tony watches Annalisa get a pedicure. She makes the guy (the pedicurer?) collect her toenail clippings and give them to her. Tony is curious. Cut to later, and Annalisa is trying out the golf club Tony brought. She shanks her first shot, and Tony tells her, "It's a man's club." She gives him a dirty look. I think the problem might be that the super-tight silver lamé pantsuit she's wearing is restricting her movement. Although to be fair, as she lines up her next shot, I notice that she's got an ass that would make J.Lo sit up and say "Mommy." Tony is having difficulty believing in the concept of a female boss. He tells her, "It'd never happen in the States." She explains that all the men are either dead or in jail. Plus, "all our men are in love to their mama, so obeying a woman, it comes natural." Tony replies, "Well, I'll be dipped in shit." Yeah, and subtext too. Careful you don't catch shigella. Anyway, as Tony admires the way she handles his club, he compliments her on her handling of the sick father and tells her he's done the same for his mother. "We're cousins," she says, with a smile.

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