...and we're back to the bathroom. Tony stands up straight and stretches in front of the mirror. Carmela comes in, clad in a sporty striped outfit from Contempo Casuals, and says in a surprised tone, "You're up." "Who the fuck can sleep with all this shit goin' on?" he asks, shuffling out of the bathroom.
Melfi's office. Tony relates that he started thinking about Jefferson Airplane earlier, and it made him think about his father. "What about him?" "First time I ever saw him whack the shit outta somebody." Melfi asks what made Tony think of that; Tony thinks it's to do with "what's been goin' on" with AJ. Melfi asks timidly why Tony's father whacked the shit out of some guy, and Tony says he'd never seen his father do something like that, although he used to "whack us kids around a little bit." "Really?" Melfi asks gently. Tony jokes that "the belt was his favorite child-development tool," but Melfi doesn't smile. Tony goes on to say that "this was different, though -- you could tell he knew what he was doin'." Melfi asks how Tony felt about his father after that. "I didn't want him to do it to me," Tony says. Melfi, not buying the jokey tone: "Seriously." Tony won't break: "Whaddya want me to say? I was glad he wasn't a fag." Melfi gives up on that angle and asks how Tony and his father got along. Tony, looking down and fiddling with a thread on his pants, says he got along "good" with his father, everybody liked his father, he knew how to have a good time, he taught Tony how to eat shellfish, blah blah blah; he tells an anecdote, clearly designed to change the subject, about slurping down oysters with Worcestershire sauce, and Melfi smiles. But Tony abruptly changes tone to one of aggravation: "My mother never ate anything raw." He adds that his father "wasn't around much." Melfi asks what Johnny did for a living. "Retail meat and provisions." Oh, hello, Euphemistic Vocation. Melfi sits, waiting; after a moment, Tony sheepishly admits that his father dabbled in numbers, loan sharking, and extortion also. Well, it's nice to have a hobby. Just kidding. Melfi asks how Tony felt about that. Tony repeats the question and shrugs; Melfi prompts him, "About your father being engaged in illegal activities?" Tony lies that he never really knew about it, and when Melfi presses him about when he found out, he gets even more shifty and says, "Who remembers?" Melfi reminds him that he thought about the beating incident this morning: "Are you concerned that your son is going to find out about you?" "Don't start talkin' to me about legitimate business," Tony grumbles, and he rambles on about chemical companies and deformed babies and toxic waste, but the effort to throw Melfi off the scent fails: "Does he know anything?" Tony gives up, saying tersely, "I don't know." "Has he asked you?" "No." "How are you gonna handle that?" Tony, getting annoyed: "I don't know!" "Did you ever talk to your father about it?" "What, are you kiddin'?" Hmm. Guess not.
Bada Bing. Girls in thongs, in an obvious shout-out to Pamie. In the back room, Silvio pours a shot of something into Tony's coffee cup and says that "that doesn't sound like Anthony," and Tony gripes, "Yesterday he's a little boy, today I gotta worry about him." While Big Pussy lines up a shot on the pool table, Silvio spikes Pussy's espresso too while complaining that his daughter gives him shit about Bada Bing and how it objectifies women, and he tries to explain to her that the girls at the Bing make fifteen hundred a week, "but this bears no weight with the principessa." Tony says that it's not the same, that "this is my son," and Pussy weighs in with the profound insight that "boys are different from girls." Tony asks Pussy if Pussy's sons ever ask "about this thing a ours." "I lied through my teeth, but they knew," Pussy sighs. "Fuckin' nitwits, they love me anyway." "It's hard to raise kids in an information age," Silvio says. Heh. "To protect them," Tony adds, and takes the pool cue from Pussy. Enter Christopher with a selection of stolen ladies' watches, which Christopher pinched from a Fed Ex van when the driver went for lunch. Pussy says admiringly, "No shit, Fed Ex -- they're usually pretty careful with those." Tony isn't as impressed: "You did this in broad daylight?" Christopher says that nobody saw him, but Tony bitches at him that "that's interstate commerce" and Christopher will get eight years, and Christopher murmurs to Silvio that he takes a licking but keeps on ticking -- like, ha ha. Not. -- and Tony agrees with me and stomps out. Christopher: "What's with his ass?" "He's got a lot on his mind," Pussy says gravely.