Sopranos
Sopranos

Episode Report Card
Aaron: A | 917 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Money for Nothing (And Icelandic Chicks for Free)

Fade to later, where Tony is watching two of the stewardesses going at it on a bed. Ahh, there's the gratuitous female nudity I've been missing for so long. Breasts are always more fun when the character they're attached to is actually alive. And not Brenda. And besides, if I can't have commercials to break up the recapping, I think I at least deserve some titties, don't you? Which reminds me that another thing I love about this show is the ability it frequently affords me to engage some of my baser instincts. As he watches, Tony takes a huge puff on his cigar. Well now, that's not just a little Freudian, is it? In the suite's bathroom, a half-naked Christopher sits on the toilet, rolling a heroin joint for his own half-naked Icelandic companion to smoke. They're suddenly interrupted by Tony pounding on the door, and Christopher quickly flushes the joint down the toilet before leaving with Tony. As they exit, we're unfortunately treated to a completely unnecessary shot of Joey Pants's hairy, pantless ass. Of course, the brown socks and flight attendant's cap he's wearing almost make up for it. I said "almost."

A very stoned-looking Christopher is driving Tony somewhere in his Range Rover. Tony continues trying to mentor the boy, but all Christopher can focus on is that Tony clearly seems to be out to get him. A frustrated Tony barks out some directions, then falls silent.

Speaking of silent, Uncle Junior and Wacky Old Guy are asleep on Junior's sofa. As always, the video playing on the TV perfectly complements the action on screen. Wacky Old Guy finally gets up to go home, but the phone rings before he can make it out the door. Junior wakes up, and rudely demands that the phone be answered. Wacky Old Guy (whom I'm considering renaming, because I've just discovered that abbreviating his title creates an unfortunate ethnic slur) speaks to the caller for a moment before hanging up and relaying the conversation to Junior. It seems that the FBI has had a mole at Dr. Lurkowitz's office for several months now, and when Wacky Old Guy mentions that said mole has just been called back to testify, Junior immediately makes the connection to Hot Lips. With a depressed sigh, uncle June collapses back onto the sofa.

Sopranos

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