Vesuvio. Artie serves Tony some shots, and expresses sorrow at Gigi's death. He clears out when Joey Pants arrives, and this time, Tony actually deigns to invite Pants to sit. Tony gets right to the point, informing Joey that he's the new capo, and Joey promises that he's "not gonna be sorry." He looks thoughtful for a moment and then says, "I need to hear that it's merit, and not just because somebody was constipated and blew a gasket." "Don't question it," replies Tony. "You wanted to be captain, you're a captain." Joey agrees not to look a constipated gift horse in the mouth, since this is exactly what he's wanted all along. "Be careful what you wish for," cautions Tony, and Joey genially tries to seal the breach, offering, "So are we finally gonna have a drink together or what?" Tony downs his shot in response, and simply gets up and walks away. I can't believe the writers passed up a chance to have him say, "Another time, maybe." That's so not like them. Treating Joey like shit is exactly like Tony, however, and I can't help but think it's gonna bite him on the ass one of these days. I just hope he's not on the toilet when it does.
Cut to a bar somewhere, and a close-up on a smoking cigarette. Okay, this isn't helping the whole "quitting" thing. Little Lord Fuckpants and a friend are playing pool while Meadow and some other girl sit in a booth across the room. Jackie's friend inquires as to whether or not Jackie Jr. has "sealed the breach" with his own Soprano counterpart, and while the Little Lord does describe her body as being "mad ripe" (and for those in the forums who feel she's too fat, I'm with Fuckpants on this one), he's forced to admit that he hasn't done the deed quite yet. Meadow comes over and begs Jackie to leave with her, but Jackie wants to stay and play some more pool. He gets all tough-guy in front of his friend, but Meadow steals his keys and heads outside.
She runs out of the bar and hops into Jackie's car, squealing off as he runs out behind her. She makes it about fifty feet before spinning out and crashing the car down a little hill. Jackie runs over frantically to find Meadow crying into the airbag, and gingerly helps her out of the now-totaled vehicle. He seems genuinely concerned for her, although whether that's due to her mad ripe body or her father's potential mad rage isn't quite clear. Meadow holds onto him closely, and begs to go back to his place. I guess what they say about sex and near-death experiences is true.