Sopranos
House Arrest

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Best. Line. Ever.

I can't even tell you how happy I am that I'm finally recapping this episode of The Sopranos. It contains my favorite line ever uttered on HBO. You'll know it when you see it.

A Zanone Brothers garbage truck pulls into the parking lot of a small business. The back opens, and the trunk dumps tons of garbage in front of the building. It's all rotten food. The owner runs out and screams for them to stop. He calls them all kinds of bad names. The sanitation workers don't stop. In fact, they dump even more. "Where do you suppose you are going?" the owner shouts. His English is fragmented, and he shouts things like, "I demand you to come back here this instant! This instant!" The truck drives off as the owner shouts down the street, "Motherfuckers! Motherfuckers!" So, his English isn't entirely broken.

A guy answers the phone, "Yeah. Zanone Brothers." Richie walks into the room at the same time, asking, "How 'bout them Nets?" The guy on the phone -- Bobby Zanone, I think -- is talking to the man with the all of the garbage. The garbage guy is complaining that the driver came over and dumped all of the garbage in front of his building. Bobby explains that it's company policy that if the customer is unhappy he gets double his garbage back, free. Bobby tells Richie that it's "the raghead from the deli" on the phone, so Richie takes the phone. Richie explains the policy. The garbage guy says he complained because the driver hasn't been making full pick-ups over the past few weeks and he got charged double for it. Richie says they had to come out twice to get all of the garbage. This is all because Tony told Richie to start charging double for pick-ups. Richie tells the guy he figured he wasn't satisfied, so he wanted his garbage back. Garbage Guy says he didn't want his garbage back. Richie says that must mean he's satisfied. "You are speaking shit to me," the man pouts into his cell phone. Richie says they'll send another truck out tomorrow, and hangs up the phone.

Neil Mink -- that's Tony's lawyer's name, right? Mink is on the phone in his office negotiating someone's sentence when Tony shows up. Tony brings a box of champagne, and Mink returns the duffel bag of cash from last week. Mink asks how everyone's doing. They make small talk about Carmela, the kids, the job. Tony asks what he owes him. Mink says Tony can pay him when he actually has to do something, which almost happened this past week. Tony announces the upcoming "Neil Mink Lecture Series." Neil tells Tony that very bad things almost happened, and that Tony should consider laying low for a while. He should take an office at Barone Sanitation and look like an honest man making an honest living for a while. "Insulate yourself from these shenanigans," he tells Tony. He says the feds have spent millions of tax dollars watching Tony's every move, and eventually they're going to want a return on their investment. Tony says he understands.

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Sopranos

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