In Camelot

Episode Report Card
Aaron: B+ | 1 USERS: A+
Johnny Be Good

Fran's house. Tony happily tells her the news about the track, and she's thrilled. As a reward, she pulls out something she's been meaning to show him, and it turns out to be a monogrammed handkerchief in a fancy wooden box. "Check out the initials," she orders, and Tony flips out when he sees that they spell out "JFK." He tells her about the captain's hat he bought back in Season 1, and Fran points out that her lipstick is still blotted on the hankie. Tony feels compelled to smell the thing for some reason (ew!), and while he's still sniffing, Fran announces that she and JFK once "had a little thing." And she does mean little. Rimshot! "March of '61," she explains. "Right before the Bay of Pigs." She tells the story, which involves her and a friend ending up at a party in the Presidential Suite at some hotel along with a bunch of celebrities: Peter Lawford, Sinatra, and -- wait for it -- Jackie Gleason. Heh. "I'm looking around," she continues, "And I glance across the room, and suddenly, I am locking eyes with John. Fitzgerald. Kennedy." He latched right onto her, and by the end of the night he was using an incredibly cheesy pick-up line involving national security and Fran's Russian-made fur coat. Oy. Why is Presidential sex always so tacky? Tony wants to hear all the juicy details, and Fran is reluctantly forced to admit that it was just a one-night thing, and that JFK blew her off the only other time she tried to get together with him. "He had something special, though," she reminisces. "That was something your mother never understood. When you're married to a powerful man, you'd damn well better make him feel powerful." Hmm. Maybe that's why I never married. Fran goes on to tell him that she once saw a picture of Livia on New Year's Eve, and his mother "looked like a refugee." But totally a statuesque one, I'm sure. Tony makes excuses to leave early at this point, and a lot of people in the forums have speculated that her insulting Livia like that must have pissed him off. I think it's something else, though. After all, the very next time we see him, he's busy fucking Valentina, so I think it's safe to assume that all that JFK talk got him horny for a "classy" mistress of his own. And besides, if Tony really was pissed, would he have handed Fran a big wad of cash like that on the way out the door? He tells her to get her phone turned back on and her rent paid up, and she strokes his face and chest in a more-than-mildly inappropriate way. "Your dad would be so proud," she sniffs. "He raised a real gentleman." Hmm. I think the JFK story got Fran a little hot, as well.

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