Agent Sanseverino's phone rings as she drives down the highway. She answers, and Adriana reports that Christopher is into the idea of witness protection. Agent Sanseverino asks when they're coming in, and Adriana says it'll be a couple more hours, because they're packing. Agent Sanseverino is upset at the change in plans, but Adriana says that she knows Christopher will change his mind if she pushes him. Agent Sanseverino gives her until 1:00 PM. Ade nods and hangs up.
Christopher fills his giant Humvee with gas, which must cost, like, a million dollars. He wipes a smudge from the finish and notices a family walking out of the convenience store and getting into what looks like a Chevy Citation. And I only know that because my dad used to have one. Anyway, this one is two-toned and rusty, and there is a bunch of crap strapped to the top with bungee cords. Christopher watches Daddy Mullet Sweatpants, Mommy Bleached Blonde, and their three Junk Food Brats load into the car. The look in Christopher's eyes says, "No fucking way." It's really obvious in retrospect, but on first viewing, I wasn't sure what that was about, and I think part of it is that while I knew that the ending of this episode was inevitable, I'm so emotionally invested in the characters that I didn't want to believe it would happen.
It's nearly 1:00 PM. Adriana packs her clothes into a red suitcase. The phone rings and she cautiously answers it. It's Tony, calling from a pay phone in a strip mall. He assures her that everything is okay, and then says that Christopher tried to commit suicide. Adriana asks if he's okay. Tony says Christopher was in Ramapo, and that he took some pills and a cop found him in a diner bathroom and took him to the hospital. Tony adds that Christopher's mom is on the way to the hospital now. Adriana looks stunned and crestfallen as she realizes that their plans aren't going to work out after all. Tony asks if Adriana had noticed anything wrong with Christopher lately. Ade says she hasn't, and Tony says that Mrs. Moltisanti said that Christopher seemed upset about something. Knowing what we know now, I have to wonder if Tony was putting the screws to Adriana, or trying to get her to confess, or what. Tony says he's heading to the hospital, and that he'll send Silvio to pick her up. And that's when I realized that Tony knew and the jig was up. Tony doesn't seem to want to get off the phone; he brings up Christopher's recent drinking spate, and then tells Adriana that he'll see her up there. Adriana grabs her head and sits down on the couch. Run for it, Ade!









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