Sopranos
Sopranos

Episode Report Card
Kim: A+ | 1152 USERS: B
YOU GRADE IT
Long Term Parking

Silvio sits in his office at the Bing, trying to get a stain out of his suit by using a toothbrush and some sort of aerosol spray. The phone rings, and it's Tony, who is still at the hospital. He tells Silvio to have Gerard from the phone company give him a call, because he wants to put traps on all his lines. Valentina's still crying in the background.

Adriana walks out of an Asian herbal store (I think) carrying a plastic bag. Agent Sanseverino and another agent quickly approach her. Over her protests, Adriana is practically shoved into a car so that they can talk.

Tony arrives back at Das Sopranohaus with his eight million pieces of luggage. A.J. greets him, although not very enthusiastically. Tony tells him to help with the bags. A.J. asks where they go, and Tony says, "The bedroom." Duh. The house is very dark and this scene is shot from a distance, both of which give the feeling that Tony's homecoming is less than warm. Carmela walks in, wearing an apron, and says that she was just starting dinner. Tony hands her a gift bag. Carmela opens it and finds a scarf. She says it will look beautiful with her black coat. Tony says it's an Hermes (which he pronounces "Her-mees"). Carmela gives him an awkward and stilted kiss on the cheek.

The Sopranos eat dinner together, silently. Tony tears into a piece of bread, and Carmela offers up some whipped butter. They're overly polite with each other. Finally, A.J. notes, "This is fucking weird." Carmela cracks up. Wait, Carmela cracks up at A.J. swearing? Is she drunk? Tony agrees that it is fucking weird. Tony and Carm giggle, and Tony says that they should celebrate.

Cut to Tony popping open a bottle of champagne. He pours some for Carmela and A.J., and offers some lessons on popping the cork properly. Heh. Tony would know all about how to pop your cork. Carmela tells a story about Mrs. Little Stevie's uncle, who was hit in the eye with a champagne cork at his retirement party and was blinded. A.J. snarks, "That's festive." Did I just laugh at something A.J. said? What is this world coming to? Tony makes a toast: "To the people I love. Nothing else matters." A.J. downs his champagne, as any teenager would. Tony tells him to slow down, because you're supposed to savor it. Carmela smiles at him. Then they all go back to eating silently. Except for Tony's grunting.

Sopranos

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