Mr. Ruggerio's Neighborhood

Episode Report Card
Aaron: B+ | Grade It Now!
The meaningless and all that's true

Furio drops Tony off at the Bada Bing, and then starts buffing his El Dorado, if you know what I mean, and if you don't, I actually do mean "buffing his El Dorado." Or maybe it's a Seville. I'm not really good with cars. Inside, Tony and Patsy Parisi are alone in the office. Parisi mopes a bit, and complains about business. Tony tries to ask him if there's anything wrong, gently at first. Parisi swears there's no problem, and that he's happy to be working for Tony. "And your brother? You've recovered from that shit?" asks Tony. Parisi nods slowly, but Tony makes him say it out loud, which he does, albeit not very convincingly. Tony seems satisfied with this, and gets up to leave. Who else saw the next joke coming? Tony invites Parisi and his kids over, and of course, mentions that they can "go in the pool." Laugh or wince? Wince, I think.

Inside, the FBI has finally gotten the bug placed. They get out of the house, and radio their success to the head agent. "Touchdown!" he exclaims, as Sting and three white guys no one's ever heard of come pouring out of the house. Okay, that was a pretty lame police/Police joke, but Sars rightly anticipated that I would be likely to stoop to such bottomless depths of wordplay, so I felt compelled to oblige.

Cut from the "touchdown" line to -- wait for it -- football practice. In the background, we see the agents assigned to tail AJ peeling off.

Morning yet again. Tony fetches the paper yet again. I make a macro that says "Tony fetches the paper," and then I realize that this is the last time he does it. He goes back inside, and the Feds use the bug to overhear what seems to be a very interesting conversation. "I've got a job for you. It could get messy, it's wet work, but I can make it worth your while." One of the agents practically creams his jeans, and then we cut back inside.

Where Tony is talking to the maid's husband. Tony wants him to rig up some sort of drainage system in case the heater explodes again. The FBI is crushed, and they're forced to turn the tape off after forty seconds. They can listen again in two minutes. I could explain the constitutional rationale behind all this, but since it's been a plot point of pretty much every cop show ever, I'll just assume you already know.

Tony and Carmela bicker for a minute over who gets to use the treadmill first. Since Carmela's been playing tennis for the whole episode and Tony's been sitting on his ass eating Sugar Pops, he gets to go first. As he works out, they discuss the new brand of coffee Carmela is using, and how it "cleaned [Tony] right out." She recommends some additional roughage for his diet, and I pity the poor FBI guy that has to listen in on this conversation. Tony goes on to talk about his problems with dental hygiene, and the maid's husband interjects with a comment about his engineering background. Since Tony and Carmela ignore him completely, I will too. As Tony goes on and on about flossing, we slowly push in on the bugged lamp. Fade out.

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