Over with the New York crew, Frank Vincent is telling jokes about Jesus on the cross, which strikes me as the sort of behavior that's appropriate just about anywhere, but especially at your boss's funeral. Johnny Sack disengages himself from the crowd of laughing wiseguys, and heads over to join Little Carmine by the coffin. Carmine Jr. already seems pretty miffed about something, and he leads Johnny over into a little alcove and immediately starts bitching him out over the Opus Dei medallion that we saw Carmine Sr. holding in his hand. Now, as some of you may know, I tend to quote the Bible a lot in these recaps, so it might surprise you to learn that my first thoughts on hearing the words "Opus Dei" involved penguins and Richard Dreyfuss. But that's just me. Anyway, all I know about Opus Dei is that expressing an opinion on it in this recap is likely to get me even more hate mail than usual, and also possibly a good whipping. So let's just move on, shall we? The argument between Johnny and Little Carmine escalates to the point where they're shouting, and everyone out in the main area can hear them. Johnny insists that he knows best what Carmine would have wanted, and adds that Little Carmine said himself that Johnny was "like a son" to the man. Little Carmine spits back that he was only being polite, and now I'm wondering if a son can just outright disown another son-by-proxy like that, without going through the father. Or the mother. Or West Virginia. Whatever. Oh, and by the way? The doctor was his mother!
Cut to Tony, sitting in his new home (more on that later) and watching Band of Brothers. Actually, it looks like what he's really watching is the companion documentary about the real soldiers that went along with the show, so I find it somewhat amusing that Tony apparently has access to a DVD player here, but Carmela can't seem to find the one hooked up to their giant entertainment center back at Das Sopranohaus. The clip he's watching is supposed to a be subtextually relevant one about a guy who sacrificed his own life to save a buddy. Except the story as it's told makes it sound like the guy didn't so much sacrifice himself as just randomly volunteer to walk straight into a bunch of explosions for no good reason. I know I praised the clip-pickers last week, but this time I think they were more interested in synergy than subtext, and it shows.
Meanwhile, at a club that isn't The Crazy Horse, Adriana and a friend are checking their makeup and chatting in the ladies' room. The friend is eventually revealed to be Adriana's presumed Maid of Honor, but I honestly can't remember if we've ever even seen her before. ["You have if you've been watching 24 this season; over there, she was variously known as Claudia, Clowdia, and The Poor Man's Angelina Jolie." -- Wing Chun] In case we haven't, I'll take time out to describe her as being EXACTLY Tony Soprano's type. By which I mean that she's got dark hair, no fashion sense, and a potty mouth that could make even Peter Krause blush. She's also wearing a fluffy white fur coat and bitching about her date. Who later turns out to be Little Paulie, which at least makes the bitching understandable, if not the coat. Adriana (who owns leopard-print wineglasses, lest we forget) gushes over the fur, which gives her friend an opportunity to deliver a whole bunch of incredibly awkward exposition about some invoice-related scam that she and her father are involved with. Yep, that's right. If you boys out there have ever wondered what chicks talk about in the ladies' room, it turns out it's the intricate accounting details and false-documentation procedures involved in executing a low-level white collar crime. Sexay! Anyway, the friend's dad didn't want her to buy the coat, but she did it anyway. "Sometimes you just gotta take care of yourself," says Adriana to her friend. Or possibly just to the writer who knew he needed to take care of this scene to set up the episode's finale.