Uh oh. Carmela is primping in the mirror again. That's a bad omen if I've ever seen one.

Cut to her in Counselor Bob's office. And, also: damn! I did not notice the major cleavage she's sporting here on my first run-through. I must be slipping or something. Wegler has ostensibly called her in because AJ still has a D in English, but also apparently because he wanted to look down her blouse a lot. Which he does while fetching her a seat. And while sitting down himself. And throughout pretty much the entire scene, in fact. When he finally manages to drag his eyes up those last few inches to her face, he informs Carmela that AJ just recently turned in a paper on Animal Farm. The problem is that the first draft was "sketchy," whereas the second was "suspiciously cogent." In other words, the kid cheated. Carmela leaps to her son's defense, blaming the whole thing on bias from the English teacher, whom she describes as "a cold fish." "I know what people think," she continues. "Italian-American, father in the carting industry...." Okay, first of all, "the carting industry"? Is Tony one of those guys who clears out the cart return bin at the local supermarket? And secondly, why so coy all of a sudden? Last time at lunch, she couldn't wait to flaunt what people "might have heard" about her husband. People who have already seen the entire episode, by the way, should feel free to insert their own coy/cold fish joke here. Bob informs Carmela that AJ's grade will mostly be decided by an upcoming term paper on Lord of the Flies. Oy. I'm not even sure AJ could make it through Lord of the Rings. But it is fun to picture him as Lord of the Dance.