The Legend Of Tennessee Moltisanti

Episode Report Card
The Legend Of Tennessee Moltisanti

Cut to Tony, seething silently next to a chain-link fence as a New Jersey Transit commuter train roars past. Pan around him to Christopher's Lexus pulling up. Tony gets in the car, and Christopher starts to apologize for coming late when Tony clouts him in the head. Christopher whines, "Didn't Paulie tell you I ain't been feelin' good?" but Tony shouts, "I wipe my ass with your feelings!" More sniping; Christopher throws it in reverse and peels out. Tony yells, "We're under a microscope and I gotta hear on the street you shot some fuckin' civilian in the foot 'cause he made you wait for buns?" "Fuckin' Paulie," Christopher grumbles, and Tony bellows, "Don't blame fuckin' Paulie!" He keeps yelling, saying that Makazian told him the Nutley police have a description and a make on the car, and why doesn't Christopher just leave a urine sample next time? Christopher tries to defend himself, but Tony yells at him to shut up and tells him that he saw Georgie with puke on his shirt, and when he asked Georgie what the fuck, Georgie told him about digging up the body; Christopher interrupts again, and again he's told to shut up: "People do that shit that wanna get caught!" Christopher scoffs, but Tony bitches him out some more about wanting "to be a big bad guy," and Christopher tries to tell him why he dug up the body, but Tony yells for the third time, "Shut up!" Silence for a moment. Christopher sneaks a glance at Tony and asks if he can try to explain. Tony shifts angrily in his seat but doesn't say no, so Christopher says in a broken voice, "I don't know, Tony. It's like just the fuckin' regular-ness of life is too fuckin' hard for me or somethin', I don't -- I don't know." Tony stares at him, then softens a bit and rubs Christopher's head: "Look at you. I bet you're sleepin' all the time, right?" It's the only thing Christopher still enjoys; he thinks maybe he has cancer, like Jackie. Tony snorts. Christopher says that "something horrible's goin' on inside my body, there's a physical change or somethin'." Tony asks how often the word "cancer" pops into Christopher's head. Christopher asks why he wants to know, and Tony says he thinks maybe Christopher's depressed. "Me?" Christopher chuckles. "I'm no mental midget." Tony looks out the window. "Right," he says after a bit, and grabs a cigarette and puts the wrong end between his lips, and Christopher points this out as Tony tries to light the filter. Too late -- Tony swears and stomps it out on the floor of the car.

Another short silence before Tony suggests too-casually that "maybe you got a serotonin problem…or whatever the fuck they call it." Christopher cocks an eyebrow: "You know about that shit?" Tony lies that he saw something about it on TV. Awkwardly, he asks if Christopher ever thinks "about…you know," and he puts his finger in his mouth and makes a trigger-pulling motion. Christopher snorts, "Fuck, no!" "Good," Tony says. Christopher shoots him another curious glance; Tony cracks, "Imagine those fuckin' losers blowin' their skulls all over the bathroom?" They both crack up. Then they both stop cracking up. Christopher eyes Tony suspiciously, then turns back to the road. Tony shoots a surreptitious glance at Christopher.

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