At the Sack-Hop, Ginny is in the kitchen, mixing a fruit salad, although personally I think she'd prefer a wafer-thin mint. I'm just saying. Johnny comes downstairs, IN HIS ROBE, and asks about some sweater he wanted to give to his father. And yeah, I know what you're saying. Any robe in a storm, right? Well, I'm a purist, and if it's not Tony in white terrycloth, then it just doesn't count. Ruben the Cuban calls at this point to inform Johnny that Joey Pants has been located at the Del Ray Hotel in Miami. Johnny orders him to send a hit man after Joey, but Ruben still has concerns. "I'd feel a lot better with the Pope's blessing," he says. "Just do as you're told," replies Johnny. He hangs up, and banters with Ginny about the fruit salad for a moment before leaving.
Das Sopranohaus. Carmela studies her real estate manual, frantically searching for any excuse to talk to Furio.
And hey, it looks like she's found one. She and AJ head over to Furio's house in Nutley, where she claims that they were in the neighborhood and decided to drop by. "No we weren't," snots AJ, but the love-struck couple ignores him completely. Furio leads them around to the backyard, and explains that he was out pulling weeds in the garden. He's also got his hair most of the way out of the ponytail, the better to look like Fabio, one would assume. Carmela asks about the garage he wants to convert, which is her quote unquote valid reason for being there. Furio, however, just wants to talk about the old days, when he worked as an olive grower in Italy. "I worked there alone…my hands in the dirt…the hot sun…the manly sweat pouring forth from my strong, manly brow…my bulging pectorals, glistening with a fine sheen of my manly musk. Would you like to touch them?" Well, okay, it was actually the subtext that added that last part, but still. Carmela looks moist just listening to the guy. Then she glances over and sees AJ, which is precisely why she brought him in the first place, and snaps out of her trance long enough to explain that zoning variances will allow him to renovate the garage as he pleases. Furio couldn't care less.
Sack-Hop. Johnny is leaving for Boston, and Ginny shows up with his freshly-cleaned coat from the opening scene. After a brief scene of domestic bliss, he heads out the door. Next, we get shots of him driving to his eventual death in Rhode Island, inter-cut with shots of Joey being stalked by the pool in Miami. Or at least we do until Johnny realizes that he forgot something, and heads back to the house. Once there, he wanders around looking for Ginny, and the director successfully milks what could have been a very ordinary scene for a surprisingly large amount of tension. Is Ginny dead? Is she having an affair? Nope. She's downstairs, sneaking a candy bar from a big stash of them. Johnny goes nuts when he finds her, and a screaming match ensues. He's all, "I thought you were dieting," and she's all, "You were supposed to quit smoking!" "Nicotine is an addictive substance," he bellows. I'll say. And in homage to my Sunday night, late-recap-writing buddy Regina, I'll give that one a big old, "Flick…ahhhhh." "I know I've gained weight these last few years," Ginny sobs. "I see the other wives, the way men look at them." "Don't I look at you like that?" asks Johnny. "Haven't I always?" Aww again. He really does love his fat, live wife. They grasp each other into a bear hug, and Johnny considers the consequences of everything that's happened so far.
Cut to Miami, where an Asian hit man pulls up in front of the Del Ray Hotel in a Honda Del Sol. Coincidence, or the prop guys getting cute? You be the judge. Out at the pool, we're treated to a wholly unnecessary crotch shot of a pantsless Joey Pants. He's wearing a Speedo, people. I don't get paid enough to do this job. He stands up, puts on a robe that still isn't Tony's robe, and heads inside. Meanwhile, the hit man crosses the lobby to an elevator, and answers his cell phone. Its Ruben the Cuban, and just as the elevator doors open to reveal a carefully posed Joey Pants, Ruben calls off the hit. The hit man, who does bear a striking resemblance to Vern Yip of Trading Spaces, demands half the money because he's already there to do the job. Hmm. I wonder if this guy only gets a thousand dollars per hit. Anyway, Joey gets on the elevator, and the two of them stare evilly at one another for the duration of the journey to the top floor. When he gets off the elevator, Joey unwisely turns around to ask, "What's your fuckin' problem?" Vern just stays silent, and the doors slide shut.