Maison de Moltisanti. Christopher and Adriana settle in on the couch after eating dinner, which gives Adriana the perfect opportunity to begin implementing her devious legal scheme. "Let's get married," she says, pointing out that they've been engaged for more than two years, and even suggesting that they head down to City Hall right away. Chris is surprised by her sudden interest, but he (at least initially) doesn't seem to be objecting too strenuously. Of course, that may just be because Adriana is rubbing her foot in his crotch and saucily mentioning that "a wife can't be forced to testify against her husband." Chris thinks things over for a minute, and then reminds her that "you can't have a club and stay out all night getting high when you have a kid." This lets all the air right out of Adriana's marriage balloon, because now she's forced to tell him what we viewers already know. After a few false starts and several gulps of wine, she finally admits that she had a "medical procedure" done back before she met him, and it left her with a punctured uterus. "Both of them?" asks Christopher. Hee! "There's only one," she explains. "That's ovaries." Incidentally, a lot of people seem to think that Christopher didn't catch the meaning of the whole "medical procedure" euphemism, and given his general lack of understanding concerning the female reproductive system, that's not necessarily surprising. Personally, however, I think he gives a look here that fairly clearly demonstrates he knows what she meant. It's quick, but it's there. Anyway, she goes on to explain that it will likely be difficult (but not necessarily impossible) for her to get pregnant, and she even mentions that "a friend" gave her the name of a specialist in Manhattan. Chris, however, has finally grasped the meaning of all this, and he's furious. "You knew you were damaged goods and you never fucking told me?" he shouts. Wow. That was a little rude. But still, he does sort of have a point. If they've been engaged for two years, you'd think she'd have mentioned it by now. That doesn't justify what he said, but Christopher is not the only bad guy in this scene. Adriana apologizes tearfully, and suggests that they could always adopt. "Oh, that's great!" shouts Christopher. "Some kid with chinky eyes called Moltisanti. He'd get his ass kicked every day." He smashes a vase and then storms out of the house, leaving Adriana alone with her tears and her yapping little field goal dog.
Episode Report CardAaron: A | 964 USERS: B-
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