Elevators. TES approaches the waiting Eyebrows, who's late for the Volvo Singles Classic up in Queens. "Why?" asks TES. "Why did you lie to me?" Will someone please push him down an open shaft. Please? Eyebrows says that because of his allegiance to Rickman, he wouldn't have even talked to her about the job: "Don't take it personally, Jack. Just research." TES feels dirty and betrayed, as do the casting directors who somehow thought TES would be a good choice for the lead. Eyebrows throws out a hat-trick of lies. "You're cute. I like you. It was fun." TES does the move that won him that Ohio state championship in rhetoric back in the tenth grade -- the meaningful point and step. Eyebrows tell him to relax, and that she's giving 2% off the top to Teach For America. The elevator doors close. The Moral Center shifts part-way back into place with a dull thud.
AlexOffice. TES, really on a roll, knocks on her door. He says that if she and Goldberg want to "rumba or merengue" that it's none of his business. No one puts Alex in a corner: she hands him their wedding invitations which just arrived. "They came out pretty, didn't they?" she says. He tells her that she should probably return them. Because he just said that it's none of business why she's taking the dance lessons with Goldberg, he asks her why she's taking the dance lessons with Goldberg. Douche-bag says what? "Because you're a better dancer than me," she lies. "And when we finally do get married...well...I'm going to be ready to dance with you." Man, I guess God gave me special glasses or something because I seem to be the only one able to see what a putz he is. Lucky me. He tells her not to work too late, and leaves.
Obligatory New York crowd shot. I watch some guy in a yellow hat for twenty seconds until I realize I'm supposed to be watching TES as he makes his lonely way down the harsh streets of the United States of Heartbreak. But then the sparkly subway grate catches my eye and I lose him again. And...done.
Scenes. "I will corner her. I will vibe her into submission," says Rickman to the boyz, presumably about Eyebrows, but it's unclear. Eyebrows herself and The Rocke-who argue. "Sell the damn stock," Eyebrows says. TES pipes in that if she wants to "bust this IPO" she'll have to place the trade at another firm. Bathroom. Eyebrows tells Alex that she and TES "ended up making out like banshees in the alley." On a street, Alex cries to TES that she thought he just needed some time and did he think he could keep "it" a secret? "And in just two weeks," says the BigVoice. "Jennie Garth returns to Fox as she joins the cast of The $treet." Jennie Garth makes a sick face to the camera and saunters off. I make a sick face to my cat and pass out.