The Voice
Blind Auditions Premiere, Part 2

Episode Report Card
Carla Sparks: C | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
Carson Daly Fails to Empathize, Part 2

In spite of the sad story, I like Mackenzie's vocal style. I also like his Super Bowl-lovin' dad's enthusiasm from the back room: "COME ON. COME ON, YES! YEAH BABY, CEE LO PUSHED THAT BUTTON YEAH!" Because when your son is made of glass, he's probably not going to be doing a lot of team sports. You gotta get your kicks where you can, dad.

A rarity on the show so far, Cee Lo was the only coach who pushed his button. I was proud of Mackenzie for only telling the Super Bowl element of his story and not the congestive heart failure part. The judges pander and play a bit before turning him over to Cee Lo. Mackenzie's dad's enthusiasm is enough to put anyone into a coma, but I like it in juxtaposition with Mackenzie's gentle nature/bones.

Julio Castillo is one of the few Americans to "fall in love with Mariachi." Three nights a week, Julio sings over some idiot's chips and salsa, while they talk about work and wish that the music wasn't quite so loud. So he's looking to break out of that. He prides himself on being "the first artist ever to sing an entire song in Spanish on The Voice." What a specific category to aspire to. Before he learned the whole performance of "La Bamba" would be in Spanish (are there even English lyrics?), Blake pushed his button. But no love from Christina, of the former Latina heritage and "Mi Reflejo."

It's between Cee Lo and Blake, who got lost in a high school gym metaphor/his desire to remind us that he won Season 2 and forgot to give constructive feedback. Cee Lo has Julio sing some Mariachi, and Julio's parents cry and hug each other ... in embarrassment? Julio chooses Blake, and will soon be buried by country singers on this team of 16.

Adam has obviously been working on his Blake Shelton impression, and is eager to show it off between performances. I really wish Julio Castillo's performance had moved me more, seeing as it was the last one of the evening, but not everyone can be memorable for the right reasons.

So, will anyone from Night 2 put you in a voting-induced coma? Will they be able to kidnap you and your family's hearts? Will you gain 100 pounds of enthusiasm after their vocals tear your phone's text-voting meniscus? Will you lose yourself in fandom and start telling all your friends about the performance you saw on "El Voz?" Are you going to finish off that wedding cake tonight? And most importantly, are we going to see that guy who sang "Replay" and then the guy who looked almost exactly like him, who sang "(Sittin' On) The Dock of the Bay" again? Is that the surprise twist? These guys are going to come out and perform with the four coaches, entirely in Spanish as Christina Aguilera pretends she never learned the language because it makes her look cooler in front of her white friends.

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The Voice

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