Now there are four people that none of the finalists wanted, tossed together to fill up time. Naia Kete, Cheesa, Kim Yarbrough and Sera Hill are doing "Superstition." Cheesa actually looks awake. That's refreshing. It's very wedding band, and I completely forgot that this Sera girl existed. Wait, is everyone coming back? Is there some creepily awesome Tony Vincent in my future? That might keep me away from the cookies.
Ooh, a Parks & Rec bit. Ron Swanson gets a spinning chair. Chris Pratt gets to be goofy with Cee Lo. Leslie can't decide between Blake and Adam. Well, now I need to watch this 18 more times. And then Carson says, "Will Leslie Knope get elected? I Knope so." And it ruins everything good about it.
Juliet has picked Erin Willet, RaeLynn and Jamar Rogers (someone's mister popular tonight). They are doing "A Little Help From My Friends." I don't think I could have predicted how much RaeLynn's grating drawl and Juliet's nasal whine would have sucked when paired together. Someone smartly bookended them with Jamar and Erin, who can really hit the required notes. Juliet does get some big power notes towards the end, but I don't think hitting some gravelly vocals in the last 30 seconds of a song really makes her a fantastic performer. Ooh, look, balloons.
Christina Milian. Nope. I'm done with her. Do I need to hashtag it? #QuitIt
Now a clip package on Purrfect the cat. OK. Well, I can get behind watching a minute of cute fuzzy kitty. Adam thinks the cat is on drugs. Blake hates the cat, as it has pooped in his seat.
Lady Antebellum is on stage (with no contestants foisted on them) singing "Wanted You More." I'll admit to drunkenly singing along to "Need You Now," but this trio is not my cup of tea, at all. And this song does nothing for me. And there's not even any crazy staging to distract me.
Tony Lucca only brings back Jordis Unga to do Fleetwood Mac's "Go Your Own Way" with him. He wanted to do the song earlier, but needed a female voice. Do you think the other semifinalists are sitting at home thinking they hate him as much as Christina Aguilera does? It's a good performance, but not especially original. I guess we're just sticking to straight up standards since the votes don't matter here.
Now we're treated to a sketch of The Voice for Animals with Kenan Thompson as Cee Lo. It's mildly amusing, but mostly just so Carson can pimp out Saturday Night Live. I preferred the P&R bit. Carson says the words Justin Bieber and the crowd goes wild. But first, we have to see how the final four deals with being "famous." They go to a party just for them, and they each get a Kia. And now it's a Kia commercial with lots of product placements. Oh, and Chris Mann just turned 30... in case you care. I know I don't.