The Voice
Live Performance, Week 1

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Live to Dance

It's the live shows! It's about time. Though I have no earthly idea how they are going to cram 24 people into two hours. Oh, Carson's little intro says that we're only hearing 12 people, the people representing Team Christina and Team Blake. That makes a little more sense, but I'm slightly worried this show is going to run into the middle of November at this rate. Twenty four people is a damned large amount of contestants. This isn't The Bachelor. Please tell me we're getting rid of a couple people this week. At least.

Carson introduces us to our coaches. Adam's ditched the houndstooth sweater for his traditional too-tight shirt, and has a fresh buzz cut to go with it. Cee Lo is like a bizarre mash-up of Elvis and James Brown. He's got the James wig, but with a satin fringed jumpsuit. Well, at least he's comfortable. Christina is wearing a snug zebra dress and no plate on her head. I'm disappointed by her lack of originality, but she's clearly not wearing a bra, which is problematic every time she moves. That's something. Blake is dressed like Blake always dresses.

Back to that vacant space known as Carson, who is explaining the hundred million ways you can vote for people on this show, from social media outlets to homing pigeons, so long as it is done within 12 hours. Still no info on how many people are getting chopped this week. If it's only one, I'm going to be massively annoyed.

Christina thinks her team is amazing. Blake thinks that his team can hold their own, but it will be tough. Next week we've got Team Adam and Team Cee Lo to look forward to, and those 12 folks are sitting in the audience chilling out. Cee Lo says his team should admire the singers on stage tonight. Carson is confused by Cee Lo's wig and goatee. Adam jokes that his hair is now on Cee Lo's head. Adam is happy to kick back and relax, before the screaming women in the audience interrupt him. He says that seeing what works tonight, will help his team prep for next week. Is that some kind of unfair advantage? Did the coaches flip a coin to see which groups went first?

First up, Jermaine Paul from Team Blake. My pick to win this whole damned show. He's doing Bon Jovi's "Livin' on a Prayer." As a Jersey girl (not by birth, but I've lived here longer than anywhere else), I'm secretly thrilled. There are some lighting issues when he's in the audience, that make it look like the image is freezing, but once he hits the stage, he brings up the intensity and the camera issues are rectified. I don't care for his jogging dance move, but man, I love when he sings the chorus... just wish his mic was louder than the instruments behind him. I think he fucking rocked it, but some technical difficulties got in the way.

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The Voice

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