The Voice
Season 3, Episode 8

Episode Report Card
Couch Baron: B | Grade It Now!
YOU GRADE IT
HAAAAAAA HA HA

When he goes into a falsetto, Adam puts his hand on his button, and Adam, you're making me sad, because for this guy you should only press it if it's labeled "Panic," or perhaps "Smart Bomb." Carson honestly looks like he's praying, but whether his prayers are answered or not, Rod finishes the song without a bite, at which point the chairs swivel and Cee Lo offers that he knew Rod was going to be "hot" given the squeals of the audience. Objection, your Honor, the witness can't see through his glasses. Cee Lo blames the song choice, as it didn't allow for a "big moment," and I was looking for a positive to that song, so thanks, Cee Lo! The rest of them damn him with faint praise as well (with the exception of Blake, who says nothing), and then Rod is on his way back to Allentown, which I'm sure is just thrilled for his return.

When we come back, it's time for 20-year-old Bostonian Caitlin Michelle, who looks like the love child of three different actresses, none of whom I can place. Caitlin is a human-interest plant, as she suffers from "Extreme Panic Disorder," which she battles with her love of music, and if you're interested in someone absolutely bludgeoning a metaphor, I encourage you to listen to all the mentions Caitlin makes of music being her "medicine." Her dad talks about how he was blown away when he heard Caitlin sing an Alicia Keys song. Ooh, was it the one with the piano in the video? Caitlin's dad can't keep it together, but I can't help but wonder who this total rando with a curlicue mustache is who can't stop staring at the red-faced, crying dad. Anyway, Caitlin, who may or may not be wearing a floral window treatment over her dress, will be singing "Cosmic Love" by Florence and the Machine.

Caitlin has an overenunciating style that sounds very Broadway to me, but she can belt, and when she gets to the meat of the song, Blake rings in for her. As she continues to pound it out, Adam gets in on the act, causing Blake to yell a poorly-concealed expletive at him, and Caitlin is soon forced to listen as the two of them do their shtick. Adam tells her she had some pitch problems but won him over, while Blake indirectly disagrees by complimenting her accuracy on the notes. Christina's stock continues to rise with me when she nudges Caitlin in Adam's direction, and Adam seals the deal by simply telling Caitlin that she's different, and he likes that. Caitlin eats that up with a spoon, not that I blame her, and Blake is a hilarious 0 for 2 on the night, although I give him credit for taking the blame in the ensuing interview for not selling himself enough, because he sure didn't. Nor did he even know who Florence and the Machine are, as Christina takes pains to point out. Adam now also has only one spot left on his team, which should by rights send the rest of the contestants into panic mode.

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The Voice

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