The Voice
The Battles, Part 2

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V is for Victory

Anyway, where were we? Oh right, Christina has selected Bald Beverly to go up against Justin. They are singing "Baba O'Riley" by The Who and of course Beverly is excited. I think her neck tattoo is excited as well. She tells Justin he is going down, and, yeah, there's no way he's winning. Beverly marches into the rehearsal room, meets Sia, and just starts wailing on the CSI theme song, like Gil Grissom owes her money. Justin, however, is more of an NCIS and Train guy and has no point of reference. Which is pretty much how I feel about both Train and NCIS. But, really, the guy claims he has never heard the song. How is that possible? He's a white dude of a certain age. He is The Who's target demographic. How is it possible that he has never heard this song? I blame the broken down American school system and too tight underwear. Justin picks it up pretty quickly, proving my point that he is probably a liar. During the rehearsal, the only thing Justin has mastered is the retired bank teller and/or bartender look (three-piece suit minus the jacket, burgundy shirt with the sleeves rolled up, striped tie) but when he heads into the ring with Beverly, he wears a leather jacket and white t-shirt as if a leather jacket will give him even a quarter of the testosterone that Beverly has oozing out of her. He's going down.

We return from commercials to be treated once again to some of the most low budget looking graphics that were probably really, really expensive. Beverly (and the entire viewing audience) pretty much try to pretend that Justin isn't there and just sings her heart out. She owns it. Cee Lo and Adam kindly pretend that Justin didn't totally let Beverly steal the show, Blake says something about Justin looking like someone who works at his bank (true!) but claims he has rock and roll in him (lie!). It's finally Christina's turn to speak and she says she is really proud of Justin, you know, for his growth. And although she's not going to pick him, he can ogle her cleavage for the next two minutes and she won't mind. He's earned it. Then she chooses Beverly and we all move on with our lives. Until next week that is!

p>Melissa Locker a.k.a Lulu Bates is changing her name to Multi-Platinum Recording Artist Lulu Bates. You can follow her on Twitter @woolyknickers.

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The Voice

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