Christina pits Ashley De La Rosa (the adorable 17-year-old who likes to do food drives) against Jonathas (the Brazilian father of two who sounds like Usher). She loves their youthful energy, so she gives them the Jordin Sparks/Chris Brown join "No Air." At the first rehearsal, it is clear that this song is way out of Ashley's vocal range. Jonathas thinks that she's nervous and that gives him and edge.

Lionel Richie and Christina advise Jonathas to stand out from the Chris Brown/Usher's of the world. They try and teach him to stay in character on stage, and acknowledge the person with him. Ashley nervously sings for Xtina and Jewel. Christina wants her to be far more extroverted. Jewel tells her that she can be unique, while Jonathas might just be a copycat. Jewel seems to know more about this show than any other advisor. During the final rehearsal Christina fondles her big lip microphone stand, and talks into the mic to tell Ashley and Jonathas how to perform. It's odd to say the least.

Ashley's in hot pink with combat boots, Jonathas is wearing a sleeveless leather hoodie. I didn't know such a horrible thing existed. I'm sure Bieber owns them in every color. Ashley botches the opening note (and several after that), and watching Jonathas trying to dance sexy with her while she stands there so vacantly is decidedly terrible. She's so off key that I can barely even hear what he's doing. He might have been fine. Hard to say.

Cee Lo thinks it was well staged, and thinks Ashley showed range. What the hell, Cee Lo? Is that alternate universe nicer than this one? Or just filled with more feathers and sequins? Adam also goes with Ashley, because she overpowered Jonathas. Overpowered with awfulness is not a good thing. Blake says that she did get pitchy (gee, you think?) but she really went for it. Christina thinks she can coach Ashley's young chops. (With a host of singing teachers and some auto-tune?) She likes that Jonathas is a professional. She likes their moves, but goes with Ashley. Well, my eardrums are disappointed, but at least I don't have to figure out how to spell Jonathas' stupid name anymore.