Adam is immediately asked to save one artist, the audience starts yelling and Adam asks them please to let him talk. "Please let me talk. Please. You can yell and scream in a second, it's just really important for me to talk to these guys," Adam tells the audience, who has been conditioned for years and years to yell and scream at will. Adam is really acting like a dad in a car commercial now.

Adam says he loves all of them, no one is better than the other, but he is forced to choose and so he must choose. He will obviously choose Melanie. He holds the room in silence for as long as possible, before choosing Melanie. Joselyn and Loren handled it really well, I think. Just know, Melanie, that AMERICA does not like you.

"You don't have to win to be a winner," Joselyn says, winning Miss Congeniality in the non-existent Voice pageant. Loren doesn't get to say anything.

Before anything else of consequence happens, let's check in with Christina Milian, who is just checking her Twitter page and raving about how awesome her phone is. Does Christina Milian know she's on TV and not bored at a friend's party?

Then, Maroon 5 sings their new single, "Daylight." Are they doing a joke? Because their name is Maroon 5, but they're all wearing solid matchy-matchy blue like BLUE 5, AM I RIGHT? Ha ha, awesome joke. But seriously, I can not get past the Garanimals. Also, Adam doesn't sound great tonight. They did use all the dry ice, though. Cee Lo was probably saving that for a Saturday night at home.

Jermaine Paul is here with his new single, "I Believe in This Life." That's a very affirming title for a song. Shouldn't they split the performances up a bit more between results? Jermaine has backup dancers this time, but it doesn't change that his song is basically like, "I'm looking at stuff and it's cool and I guess I'm just living and really having a good time existing." Jermaine, I think we can do better.