West Wing

Episode Report Card
Miss Alli: F | 13 USERS: D
In the Newzzzzz...

Moving on to what will be passing for the B-plot, Andrew says that he'll be with the Vatican people all day discussing the Pope's upcoming visit. There is banter with Carol over whether it's "His Eminence" or "His Holiness." Then there's some even less funny comment about "imminent" and "Eminence" and OH MY GOD PUT A FORK IN MY EYE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE. Sorry. Oh, and C.J. is having Unknown Eric monitor crime news, apparently to see if anything looks like the FBI is involved. Hilariously, after she says "FBI involvement," other staff members mutter, "FBI? FBI? Rhubarb, rhubarb, rhubarb." Because they were surprised to hear the FBI mentioned, you see. When they're all gone, Carol and C.J. and Donna all huddle, because there's evidently something afoot. C.J., meanwhile, interviews: "I am here to articulate the president's message, and to honestly [sic] inform the press, and through them the public, about what is happening on any given day." Which is basically the same thing she's already said a couple of times. So. Donna tells C.J. that she needs to come to Leo's office, and C.J.'s like, "All of us?" right in front of Carol, and Donna pats Carol on the shoulder while saying, "They didn't say," so C.J. can't bring Carol, apparently, and as C.J. and Donna walk away, Donna guiltily says, "I'm so sorry." Believe me, Donna, if Carol knew what C.J.'s day is going to be like, she wouldn't be angry at you for not taking her.

As C.J. stands around outside Leo's office, Documentary Guy asks her whether she thinks the FBI director will let the cameras into the meeting. She says it's "hard to tell." And then he asks her whether it's a typical morning, and she says sort of, and then they discuss the Heisenberg principle, and C.J. paces, and also, I made pan-seared salmon for dinner last night, which really was incredible. You need a cast-iron pan and a towel to wave at your smoke detector. What? Oh, the show, the show, right. Yeah, anyway, it turns out that the FBI director has decided to let Documentary Guy and the cameras into the discussion of a developing situation. Because if there's anything the FBI is known for, it's definitely openness, especially when all information is not yet in. The FBI director tells C.J. that six federal agents are currently surrounding a cabin on Shaw Island, off the coast of Washington. (The state, not the city where all vitality is currently being sucked out of everything living.) A naturalized Yemeni-American, known to me as Holed-Up Guy, is in the cabin with his family. He was being investigated for arms trafficking, and the agents tracked him to the house where, ninety minutes ago, there was gunfire. Leo and the FBI types try to dismiss C.J. with little more information than that, but she gently says that she expects to be asked questions about it and might need more. The FBI guy reassures her that they can handle it, and not to worry her pretty little head. (Not in those words -- I'm rounding to the nearest patronizing insult.) And then when she starts to ask for clarification, Leo totally shows her up in front of the room and the documentary crew by giving her the icy, bored "Thank you, C.J.," and sending her out. We again see C.J. say this: "I am here to articulate the president's message, and to honestly [still sic] inform the press, and through them the public, about what is happening on any given day." The quote so nice, they showed it twice.

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West Wing




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