Wednesday morning. C.J.'s arriving at the office, and Carol's loading her up with work. One item: "Legislative Affairs says a new amendment is moving through Ways and Means. Congressman Wendt wants a tax cut for stay-at-home moms." C.J.: "Too late to slip in incentives for stay-at-home Congressmen?" Hee. While we're on it, though, shouldn't it be "stay-at-home parents"? Or will it be necessary to have a vagina to claim it? Carol says that POTUS is flying to Wendt's district in South Carolina on Saturday: "They want you to read the guidance before the gaggle." Having gotten though all that, Carol reminds C.J., "So, tomorrow's the big day." C.J.: "What?" Carol: "Mystery Ben." C.J.: "What about him?" Carol says he's coming by to say hello; C.J. says he's not. Turns out he's in town, and Carol gave him an appointment. She says he seemed nice. C.J. says he's very nice, and is also very married. Carol: "Not anymore." C.J. asks: "He and Katie split up?" Carol: "Katie's living in Portland with an orthodontist." Oh, good Lord. This really feels like ER. C.J. seems relatively indifferent to this news. Carol adds, "And Toby and Josh are in your office." C.J.: "What do they want?" Carol: "To make fun of you, I think." C.J.: "And you let them in?" Carol: "And got them coffee!"
C.J. enters her office as Josh says there's a problem with the South Carolina trip: "Congressman Wendt, who singlehandedly blocked our tax credit to expand child care for working families, is attempting to bind the feet of your entire gender [sic] with his paleo-chauvinist stay-at-home mom tax cut." C.J. says she'll read the bill and supporting materials now. Josh: "What if you just kick up a cloud of dust about the revenue impact and mention that he's the Darth Vader of child care?" Oh man -- yup, directed by Alex Graves. Get the dimenhydrinate. The camera is all over the place! Whee! Slidey-glidey, whirly-swirly camera. I mean, it doesn't have to look like an Ozu film, but this guy's a bit much. And it's written by John Wells. It's like they knew I was leaving. C.J. actually wants to read the documents. Josh complains that they're already rolling over on the tax side; C.J. interrupts to ask if she can take a moment to read the bill and supporting materials.
C.J.'s finally gotten her coat off and gotten herself settled at her desk. Toby and Josh both sit down in the chairs in front of her desk, like they're intending to wait while she reads. But they also look like they're up to something, with their chins in their hands. She asks, "Okay, what?" Toby: "We think you should go on the Taylor Reid show." Josh: "The chicken thing has legs." Toby: "With those pointy little toes." C.J. refuses. Apparently Tyson Foods is offering C.J. a lifetime supply of wings and thighs if she'll do a print ad for whole fryers. Well, isn't that a nice little product placement? Also, C.J.'s favourite restaurant -- the Oval Room -- has a new menu item composed of chicken, avocado, and poached eggs called "the C.J. Cregg Egg." That's lame. Why not "The C.J. Cr-Egg?" C.J.: "You're enjoying this, aren't you?" Josh wants her to go on the show and show she has a sense of humour. Toby: "You could wear a chicken suit." I know that historically, Allison Janney + poultry has equalled comedy, but you can only go to that well so many times. (Maybe that should read, "You can only go to that, Wells, so many times.") Josh: "Take him even semi-seriously and he'll lay off and find another cluck to pluck." Gah -- "cluck to pluck?" No. Perhaps someone in the CIA could arrange for Taylor Reid to come down with a mild case of avian flu, though.