West Wing
Dead Irish Writers

Episode Report Card
Deborah: D+ | 2 USERS: B
Voulez-Vous Soûler Avec Moi?

Josh runs into Leo, who asks where POTUS is. Josh says he and Charlie went off to work on the toast. Leo starts to say that he's going to need a few uninterrupted minutes with someone, but doesn't get to finish, because we hear John, Lord Marbury brightly exclaiming, "Gerald!" Leo: "Yeah." Marbury: "Gerald...old sock!" Josh: "Gotta go!" Leo: "Yeah." Leo makes a mental note for Josh's next performance evaluation of his desertion in the face of lunatic Brit-ness.

Marbury: "Brendan McGann cannot come to the White House." If I'm smart, I'll just make a macro for that phrase right now. Leo walks along, asking John how he is. He says he's fine, but, "Brendan McGann cannot come to the White House." Leo, spotting his salvation: "Hang on...Toby!" Toby starts to walk over when he hears Leo's voice, and then sees Marbury and kind of stops in his tracks. He can tell there's no way out, but he just freezes there. Leo says, "You know Toby Ziegler." Marbury says they've met. Leo says, "Toby, come here." Toby does. Leo reintroduces Marbury and Toby (and Leo calls him "Lord John Marbury," instead of "John, Lord Marbury," but considering John calls Leo "Gerald," I don't think he has any right to complain). Toby: "Good evening, Your, uh, Lordship." Marbury stammers, "Uh, well, good evening, yes." Leo orders Marbury, "Talk to him about McGann," and takes off. All those struggling with delegation issues should study Leo McGarry.

Toby asks if Marbury has objections to McGann coming to the White House. Marbury: "My objections are irrelevant. I convey the objections of Her Majesty's Government." Toby: "Which are?" Marbury: "He's a terrorist." Toby: "Well, let's hang on a second: Sinn Féin is a political party; in fact, the oldest in Ireland." Marbury: "And the political wing of the IRA...a terrorist cell. You are honouring a man at your St. Patrick's Day dinner allied with car bombers and murderers of British soldiers, this not to mention Irish men, women, and children." Toby: "Yes, sir." Marbury continues, "And you're doing it to appease Democrats from New York City and Boston." Toby says McGann's not being honoured, he's only being invited. Marbury asserts, "He shouldn't be given a visa." Toby: "And I think we have to be careful how we use the word 'terrorist.'" Good God almighty. I howled so loud at this I thought my neighbours would call the police. That's rich, especially coming from the Toby of "Night Five." John snorts out a little sigh. Toby, struggling to establish some sort of more comfortable rapport: "Can I call you 'John'?" Marbury's reply: "I am John, Lord Marbury, Earl of Croy, Marquess of Needham and Dolby, Baronet of Brycey, England's Ambassador to the United States." I have the vague feeling there are some peerage errors there but I'll leave it to some Debrett's geek to figure it out. "And a terrorist is a terrorist even if he wears a green tie and sings 'Danny Boy.' Yes, you can call me 'John.'" Toby smiles and asks if Marbury feels like a drink, to which Marbury replies, "Does the Queen Mum have a monobosom?" No, he actually says he was looking for some Lagavulin, whatever that is. I don't drink, nor do I care. He then explains, "It's a sixteen-year-old islay, single malt." Toby: "I know Lagavulin." Marbury: "They usually have it here." Toby suggests that they go down the street: "The guy keeps a bottle there." Marbury's only too happy to follow the guy who knows where to get the right booze.

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West Wing




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