There's a staff meeting attended by quite a few people in the Roosevelt Room at 7:00 AM. Sam comes in saying he's got copies. Josh asks, "Have you read it?" Sam says, "Bits and pieces." Josh wants to know Sam's impression of it; Sam says he's going to set up a war room downstairs. Must be pretty bad, whatever it is. Josh is surprised to hear of the serious nature of the problem. Sam dumps a pile of documents on the table, prompting a drowsing C.J. to jerk her head and announce, "I'm up!" Sam explains that he's handing out copies of What I Saw at the Bartlet White House: The Camera Doesn't Lie, by Ron Burkhalt. C.J. asks whether Sam has read it. They basically repeat the whole conversation he just had with Josh, and Sam asks, "How many times do you think we're going to have to do this?" I wouldn't mind knowing that myself. C.J. asserts that she is up. Sam says that they're each going to take a couple of chapters. Ginger contributes that they've assigned chapters by going through the index, so if people find that they've been given chapters that aren't about them, they should trade with someone else. Sam wants them to note any fact, no matter how trivial, that's wrong, so that they can attack the author's credibility. Ed says, "Well, right away I see one." Sam asks what it is. Larry and Ed trade documents as Larry explains, "I'm Larry. He's Ed." Hey! Le shout-out pour moi! ["Totally." -- Wing Chun] Okay, I think you all know I'm not someone who claims every teensy thing is a personal shout-out, but if that isn't, I don't know what is. I laughed out loud, and as I happened to be eating an apple at the time, also almost choked on a piece of apple. But it was worth it. Resolution #1 for 2002: Keep Ed and Larry straight. I think I can do this. C.J. comments, "I usually don't know that." Hee! Josh wonders if they're not taking it a bit too seriously. Sam thinks not. Josh says the guy was a White House photographer who got fired, and Josh remembers him as a buffoon. I love that word. Buffoon. Resolution #2: Use the word buffoon more. Sam confirms that he was a buffoon: "Which has always stopped the American public, to say nothing of the press, from taking something seriously." Sam says the book will be in stores in three weeks, and that the press will have excerpts in a week, so that's how much time he has to "turn this guy into a punchline." Larry reads, "'Bartlet was playing a round of golf with Toby Ziegler, the prickly, mumbling Communications Director, whose inner, bitter darkness spelled the breakup of the one marriage we know about.'" Holy crap, that is some bad writing. Poor Toby. He does mumble, though. And he is a bit prickly, but that's why I love him. Everyone's uncomfortably silent for a moment, and then C.J. leans around the small lamp on the table blocking her view of Toby, and says, "It was miniature golf, wasn't it?" Toby leans to the same side and says, "Yeah." C.J. disappears behind the lamp again. Toby asks if there's anything else. The meeting breaks up.
On the way out of the meeting, Josh seeks Toby's advice on his love life. He asks whether Toby knows Amy Gardner. Toby knows who she is. Josh says he's known her for a long time; she dated his college roommate. He mentions that he saw her a couple of weeks ago (details in "The Women of Qumar"). Toby, always thrilled to be sought out on the subject of relationship issues of other staffers, more or less listens as Josh rambles on. "I don't know...she changed her hair or something, something's going on." He really is addled. Toby looks around somewhat apprehensively and asks Josh what he needs as they enter his office.