After Bartlet goes off on yet another History of Chess tangent, Toby makes his opening move; as with Sam, the President makes a comment: "Ah, the Evans Gambit..." "There's no such thing as the Evans Gambit," says Toby. Oh, way to go, Toby. Didn't you get the memo? The first rule of Chess Club is not to talk about Chess Club. The second rule is not to challenge Bartlet's knowledge of chess strategy. That's just a lose-lose situation. The only person who wins is the writer looking for some filler. After thirty-four minutes from Bartlet on the origin of the nipple on top of the bishop piece, Toby asks, "What is our topic?" (Chess move.) Oh boy. Worms. Cans. Open.

Bartlet: Re-election and the Bartlet Psychosis. [chess move]
Toby: Seems to me the last time we were here, we didn't do too well. [chess move]
Bartlet: So we get right back on the horse. [chess move]
Toby: I was out of line sir, I really do apologize.
Bartlet: You apologized already, so let's get back on the horse.
Toby: Neither one of us rides horses. [chess move]
Bartlet: That makes it more likely we'll learn something. [chess move]

Oh, chess. Is there anything you can't teach us? Knock knock! It's Charlie, who relays Sam's move (Bishop to Queen's Knight 3). Bartlet says, "Excuse me, eleven moves," as he leaves the room. What a smug little bastard!