West Wing
Inauguration, Part I

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A Thoroughly Unimportant Country

Will meets with the State Department guy: Bonnie introduces him as Assistant Secretary of State for Public Affairs, Bryce "Pole So Far Up My Ass You Could Hang Your Hat On My Forehead" Lilly. Bryce comes in, shakes his hand, and informs Will that he's young. Will: "Um...thank you." You can tell right away that this guy's a complete pill. Will finds out that this guy's been in his job since three POTUSes ago. He tells Will the difference between the two parties is that "Republicans want a huge military but they don't want to send it anywhere. The Democrats want a small military and they want to send it everywhere." Will says with a polite smile that he's heard that. Bryce says that when he heard the name "Bailey," he got a "chill in [his] occipital." Turns out he's had run-ins with Will's father Tom in Brussels. Bryce learns that Will's on a three-week contract with the DNC to work on the speech. Bryce starts to get on his high horse about how important he is, but Will launches into his mission, which is to discuss the approved language for the speech. Bryce says that he should be discussing this with Toby. Will says that Toby asked him to speak with Bryce. Will quotes, "'America stands alone as the indispensable nation -- a force for peace, freedom and prosperity on all corners of the globe.'" Bryce says that's almost exactly what they wrote. Will says it is exactly what they wrote and that he's quoting is precisely. Bryce: "You memorized it? It was 1,200 words." Will: "I'm pretty sure it was 1,123." Heh. Geek. Bryce wants to know what Toby's concern is. Will begins by pointing out that globes don't have corners. That is a pretty stupid expression. Bryce hopes this isn't about style rather than substance. Will assures him that it's about substance. Bryce: "We've been over this long before you got here, and I imagine we'll keep on going over it long after your...three weeks are done. This White House has to be careful about the use of force. It's a hostile Congress." Will says he'd personally have no problem with using force on Congress, but that it's not his call. Bryce: "This President can't write himself a blank cheque when it comes to foreign policy. Especially, this President." Will: "'Especially this President?' Because of the clause in Article 1 that says not every President gets the full powers of Commander-in-Chief?" Bryce exhales a huffy little snort and asks if Will's rewriting the section. Will is. Bryce: "Dramatically?" Will: "Well, I like to think I have a certain flair." Hee. Bryce meant "significantly." Will says that's what POTUS wants. Bryce wants to know if this is being done in consultation with State. Will says that's Toby's call. Bryce stands up, saying: "Thank you, sir. Apparently, I'm not done with the Baileys." He walks out. Will mutters to himself, "Apparently not, you effete..."

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West Wing

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