West Wing
King Corn

Episode Report Card
LTG: B | 1 USERS: A+
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King Cornhole

Back on the Beyond the Fringe World Tour. Donna is chatting with some guy who's wearing flannel shirt, a down vest, and a baseball cap, just so you know he's a hick. There's a sign on the wall that reads "Edgars: The Friendly Fascist." What is that, friendly fascism? Do the brownshirts deliver a muffin basket before they take you away to a camp? Donna asks Edgars if it's true that his platform would allow all citizens to carry concealed weapons. He clarifies that he wouldn't allow it -- he would require it. Please -- if you want to give me a gun, you'll have to shove it in my cold dead fingers.

At the next stop on the tour, the candidate is playing his guitar and singing "Peace Train" while Donna, Christine, and Trevor look on. The guy can actually sing. Nobody says a word, but Christine does look like she's getting into it a little bit.

Bob and Will are walking back towards the campaign bus, having just left some event. Bob is complaining that the pepper sausages were too hot. This may just be the time I spent in Texas talking, but I refuse to believe that there is any really spicy food to be found in Iowa. Bob asks for a quart of milk and a bucket of sand. I understand the milk, but what the hell is the sand for? Or is that just a joke about putting out a fire? Here's some advice, Bob: if your jokes require that much thought, they are bad jokes. (And I know from bad jokes.) As Bob boards the bus, an aide gives him the names of the donors who are waiting to speak to him. Bob is really good at this part -- he has an instant camaraderie with these folks. He tells the donors that he needs to go take off his coat, and that he will return to them in a few minutes.

Bob and Will walk to the back of the bus. Bob has looked over the ethanol speech, and thinks it sounds fine. He asks who else is speaking at the expo, and Will tells him, "Hoynes before you, Clarkson and Santos after you. The Republicans go tonight." Bob wonders if Vinick is going to come out against ethanol, but Will is certain that he will flip. Apparently, Vinick has a long history of speaking out against ethanol. The Veep tells Will that he saw the last speech that Vinick gave on the topic in the Senate, and he was so impressed that he's not sure how he would have voted if it had come down to a tie. Of course, it didn't come down to a tie -- the vote in favor was something like eighty-two to eighteen. Will is "surprised that there were eighteen senators without presidential aspirations." Will thinks that if Vinick wants any chance of winning, he'll say that, as a Senator from California, he voted against ethanol because it was bad for the state, but as President, he would support it because it's good for the nation. Bob gets the funniest and most cryptic line of the episode in response to that: "He'll pull a groin muscle reaching around behind him to pick up that one." As Bingo Bob gets ready to return to the front of the bus, he tells Will that Vinick is right about ethanol: "It takes more oil to transport it and fertilize it than we save using it." Will seems a bit panicked at the idea that Bob might be changing the speech, and Bob gives him no reassurance as he goes to schmooze the donors.

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West Wing

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