West Wing
Swiss Diplomacy

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WTF?

Leo enters his office, where von Rutte thanks Leo for seeing him without an appointment. He explains that there's been a message from Tehran: "The Ayatollah's son has a congenital heart condition: Eisenmenger's Syndrome. His best chance is a simultaneous heart and lung transplant." Which Ayatollah? There's more than one. I don't know if we're pretending Khomeini's still alive, or whether the current Iranian Chief of State, Ayatollah Khamenei, is standing in for him, or what. ["Maybe it's Ayatollah Pantsmorgan of Qumar." -- Wing Chun] Leo wonders if the Ayatollah asked Japan. It turns out the procedure has only ever successfully been done by Americans, and Japan's the only other country that's even tried to do it. Leo: "Coming close doesn't matter on this. It's not the Gemini missions. I'm gonna talk to the President, Chris, but if it means bumping an American off the donor lists..." Wait, he's "Chris" all of a sudden? Didn't Margaret just have to tell him ninety seconds ago that he was Ambassador von Rutte? Also, isn't like, every third guy on this show named Chris? Didn't we just have Chris Whitaker last week? Isn't Josh's ex-roommate/Amy's ex-boyfriend named Chris? Isn't there a reporter named Chris? And let's not forget Sir Christopher Nealing-Roach. No doubt I've missed some. Just for the record, here are some other men's names a writer could use: Adrian. Basil. Carlos. Dolph. Ezekiel. Fritz. Griffin. Hoyt. Ignatius. Joel. Kiefer. Liam. Maynard. Nigel. Ozzy. Parsifal. Quinn. Ragnarok. Salvador. Thor. Ulysses. Vern. Waldo. Xerxes. Yves. Zoltan. Sorry, got carried away there. Just some suggestions. Anyway, Chris says that Iran has a donor. Leo: "A donor or a dissenter?" Ho ho. Chris says, "This is from Doctors Without Borders." An excellent organization, one which I support, but I'm not sure this sort of thing actually falls within its mandate. Leo: "It wasn't directly from the Ayatollah?" Chris says that DWB/MSF was approached by the Ayatollah's brother-in-law. Leo: "This is coming through you, through an NGO, through the brother-in-law? Guy's gonna put his son's life in the hands of the infidels but he'll keep his distance, huh?" Oh, I love the "infidel" thing. Can never get enough of that. Chris replies, "The hardliners control the Majlis. Things are difficult for him with the Shehab missile tests. He cannot have a problem with his right flank." Leo: "Yeah, much better we should have a problem with ours." Leo says he'll talk to POTUS. Leo looks at the monitor, where POTUS is holding court with the press, and turns up the sound. Jed's jovially saying, "Don't get me wrong, Mark, I think January's a good month..." Leo turns the sound off again and says, "Yeah, the President, Generalissimo, whatever he comes back as." Credits. Dude, he's the Grand Poobah of the Greatest Superpower Ever.

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West Wing

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