Will's still trying to turn the Robert Palmer girls into speechwriters. One of them is reading silently along with him as he reads her work, which urges its audience to teach their children that the Republican tax plan is a job killer. Will doesn't think that's going to work out so well. Elsie wants points for their candour. Will calls on Number 24, who reminds him with some exasperation that her name is Cassie. Really, Will. There are only two names to remember here: Cassie and Lauren. It's not that hard. If you just look at whichever Lauren you're talking to everyone will sort it out. Or you could call them by their last names. Isn't that what you'd do if they were guys? He starts to read from her remarks to the National Headache Foundation and asks, "Is there really a National Headache Foundation or did you just make that up, like the London School of Ballet?" Cassie: " Yeah...I was an American Studies major at the University of Texas." Will says he knows: "You don't think I know how to retrieve information?" Cassie wants to know what he was doing looking her up. He says he was doing his job. ["Why would she lie about that? It's stupid." -- Wing Chun] Lauren (Chin) says the phone is for him. It's Toby. He's out on a balcony or patio; in the background you can see people playing pool inside. He asks Will how it's going. Will wants to know why Scott booked Sam into the Newport Beach Chamber of Commerce. Toby asks whether he told Will to worry about the speeches or worry about Sam's campaign. Will: "I worry about Sam's campaign without anyone telling me to." Toby asks him to read the speech for the swearing-in of the Ambassador. Will: "Ambassador Stanis will help to build and sustain a new era of cooperation between the United States and Hungary. And let's please all remember that cutting capital gains taxes is a bad idea." Toby: "Okay, you're going to polish that up?" Will is.
Over at the pool table, Frenchie and Charlie are playing pool. Frenchie asks, "Who will pay in the tax plan you're proposing?" Charlie says the President is proposing it, not him. He explains that there will be a 1% tax increase on the wealthiest 1% of the population in order to pay for a plan that would make college tuition fully tax-deductible for anyone making under $80,000 and incrementally tax-deductible after that. Frenchie says it's ridiculous. Charlie: "That's 'cause you're part of the 1%." Frenchie says he doesn't think taxes are too high; he thinks they're too low: "You see? You don't know me." Charlie: "Yeah. Speaking of people getting to know you...you and Zoey went to a couple of runway shows in Paris and there were an awful lot of pictures." Frenchie: "That is avoidable?" Charlie says it's not completely avoidable, but it's somewhat avoidable: "And you should try, 'cause it's a security risk." Frenchie wants to know why. Charlie: "'Cause of the details crazy people pick out of photographs. You can make the scene without making a scene, you understand?" Frenchie says he took Zoey to meet his parents. Charlie says that Ma and Pa Eurotrash weren't at the Versace show. Frenchie: "She's a sexy girl, Charlie. She likes having her picture taken." Charlie says she doesn't. Frenchie sends a ball into a corner pocket and says, "She doesn't mind having it taken with me." Shut up, Pierre. Charlie, if you're not going to shove that pool cue up his ass, may I? Not only can I not figure out what Zoey sees in this irritating walking stereotype but I'm at a loss as to figure out what the hell Charlie still sees in her. Zoey comes wandering up and stands close to Frenchie, who tells her they were talking about taxes. They start sucking face as Charlie watches for a moment. He's thinking, "Vas-donc vous chercher une chambre!" But he doesn't say it. He puts his pool cue away (not, unfortunately, where I think he should have stowed it) and says he's got to get to Sam's rally. Zoey says they're right behind him.